Speechless
by Teddy'sTwin
Summary: James Potter loves Lily Evans and Lily Evans loves James Potter- but she won't date him. She wants a lasting relationship that she knows he can't give, and terrified that she'll be hurt. Will that change when she looses her voice in a Potion's accident?
1. Marauder Speculations

James Potter sat fiddling with his Head Boy's badge, waiting impatiently for his friend, who continued to mess with his perfectly fine hair and examine the neatness of his robes. Which couldn't be too neat, because then he'd look like a prat.

"Impossible…" James heard Sirius Black mutter to a strand of his hair.

"I can relate," James said crossly, glancing to meet his friend's eyes in the mirror. "Padfoot, let's go-."

"You wouldn't miss seeing your lovely Lily-kins. I've still got another- thirty seconds," Sirius grinned in the mirror at his friend, waving his hand at him absent-mindedly. Part of him was actually worried about his appearance. The larger half was amusing himself watching his friend's- scratch that, _best_ friend's anxiety over his love life, or in this case lack there of.

Remus Lupin trudged out of the bathroom, toweling his mop head.

"Morning you lot," he said as he went to the edge of his four poster, "Prongs, aren't you cutting it a bit close?" Remus asked, glancing in the mirror over Sirius, before shrugging at his reflection and moving to gather his bag by the only made bed in the room.

"_Yes_," James agreed imploringly, "and if Mr. Narcissistic here would hurry up-."

"No calling me names I don't understand," Sirius said airily, before grinning, and turned away from the mirror with one last fluff of his hair. "Ready to go now."

"Finally, thank Merlin," James sighed exasperatedly, and hurried out the door pinning his Head Boy badge on as he went, Remus following in a casual walk. Sirius shook his head at his friend, his bag slung haphazardly over his shoulder and his clothes and hair an untidy mess. If Remus would care, he'd be as sought after as James and Sirius, or almost.

Instead, Sirius rolled his eyes at the lump in the fifth bed, "Oi!" he yelled, throwing Remus' towel he'd folded neatly.

The lump sat up straight, towel covering his head, "Wha-?"

"Wormtail, get out of bed! It's bloody seven thirty seven!"

"PAD-foot!" James called from down the stairwell, sounding annoyed.

Sirius ran off as Peter struggled to get himself free of the towel, "Wait for me!"

"Right on schedule, as usual," Sirius shook his head slowly as he trotted down the last few steps into the Common Room, worried at his friend's punctuality, noting the way James sat oh so casually, and yet Sirius knew James was really as rigid as a board. Lily Evans always made him so unnaturally nervous. It was agitating, but, it was James, so, Sirius shrugged the notion off and sank into a seat next to Remus, who was doing some last minute studying or something or other with a book.

Sirius didn't bother to sit beside James, knowing he'd be moving on in T minus fifty seconds and there was no point trying to talk to him anyways until he'd been rejected by Lily the first time in the day, "Going to just oogle or make an attempt, ten galleons," Sirius said to Remus.

Remus looked up from his book at him, "I haven't got ten galleons, you know that," smiled Remus wryly.

"Indulge me Moony." If they were going to have to endure this they might as well make a bet of it.

Remus stared at James, cocking his head as he studied their friend, "I'd say attempt. It's been awhile."

"Alright then," Sirius said smugly, watching the stairs to the girl's dorm, "Twenty-five, twenty-four, twenty-three, twenty-two- ooo, I'm off."

"Twenty one seconds off mate," Remus grinned, tossing his bag onto the seat so it took the spot James had been in moments ago. Sirius groaned as Remus looked through the pages of his book to make sure he had all his homework done, "And you owe me ten galleons."

They watched their friend meander towards the red head coming down the stairs with her two friends.

Remus watched curiously, and he paused as he saw Lily Evans blush at James' approach, and her two friends exchange glances.

That was new.

"I'll win it back. Hex or shove?" Sirius interrupted Remus' thoughts, determined to make a game out of everything, "I say hex. Evans hasn't hexed James in two- no, Godric! She hasn't hexed James since the beginning of the school year!" Sirius said, surprised by this revelation, as was Remus. Lily Evans hadn't hexed James Potter since the beginning of their school year. Remus closed his book sharply, but Sirius lost his perturbed look, shrugging it off, "Prolly because she's Head Girl now or something. But she'll do it today."

"I don't think she will," Remus muttered as Lily reached the last step of the staircase. Remus continued to blink, confused at Lily Evans' continuing blush, "What by Merlin…" he said in astonishment.

"Good morning, Evans," smiled James with his usual cocky grin.

"No thanks to you, Ja-Potter," she said, and looked away.

Remus watched, gaping, as she stuttered embarrassedly over growling his last name, looking for support, but her two friends had abandoned her.

"You're going to owe me twenty galleons, chap," Remus said with a grin, swallowing his surprise. It had been bound to happen sometime. This was going to be more interesting now that they were both Heads of the school. How had Remus not seen it before?

"I'm- here…" panted Pettigrew, slouching down next to Remus on his bag, which Remus tugged, annoyed, out from under him, "Wha'd I miss?" he asked, looking at James and Lily who were standing, talking to each other inaudibly. "Evans hasn't hexed James yet?"

"It's coming," said Sirius, watching tensely.

"Why are you still standing in my way?" they heard Lily ask, her green eyes fiercely peering up at the Quidditch captain once more. James blinked at her in astonishment.

"Because you called me James."

"I did not," said Lily hiding her deepening blush by ducking around him and walking quickly away.

"Not even a shove," said Remus, eyebrows raised, as James followed.

"Wait for it," Sirius said tersely as they got up to follow.

"Yes you did," James sang, his face alight.

"Honestly, James-." She stopped herself mid-sentence, now blushing madly, and quickened her pace as she headed toward the portrait hole.

"So how much is Sirius in debt to you now?" said Peter to Remus as they followed the arguing couple to the portrait hole, missing how Lily stumbled and James steadied her with an extra bright smile.

"I think it's around two hundred and fifty three galleons, sixteen sickles and fourteen knuts," Remus replied lightly to Peter's question.

"You read minds, I swear it," Sirius grumbled as Remus laughed.


	2. Informalities and Accio Charms

Ahead of the Marauders, Lily Evans was a mess. She clutched her books tightly to her chest, because she hadn't had time to put them safely in her bag, and plowed forward, hoping to lose them in the race to the Great Hall where she would hopefully find her friends and hide with them until Potions, hopefully never having to see that boarish, brainless-

Because it was all ruined now.

She had called James _James_! What had she been thinking?! He couldn't figure out how she felt about him- life with him was already complicated enough as it was! How she felt about him wasn't for anyone else to know but herself- though she couldn't fool her friends. They'd been onto her since last year, and they didn't understand why she wouldn't go for him, like any other normal girl would.

Of course, a normal girl would have run to James Potter if he liked her. And then that unfortunate girl would be dumped in a week or so and left to themselves, continuing to pine for the boy she was yelling at over her shoulder. If she had a relationship with anyone, she wanted it to last.

She was in her seventh year now, Head girl and- even though she'd never admit it- terrified of being hurt by James Potter. It was better this way. She'd get over him. It was just a crush- right?

"You called me James," he said, suddenly striding along beside her. Curse his long legs.

"It's your name, isn't it?" she countered.

"Well, yeah," he faltered and she smiled triumphantly. "But Potter's my name too."

"A formal version," the words slipped out of her mouth before she could kick herself.

"We are on informal grounds now?" he grinned, wiggling his eyebrows ridiculously, trying to elicit a laugh out of her.

She screwed up her mouth in a frown instead, "You wish."

"So I can call you Lily?"

"No."

"Why not?" he asked and his eyes slid over to meet hers mischievously, "_Lily_?"

She groaned, feet falling on the marble steps that lead to the Great Hall, "Bugger off, Potter."

"Not until you say my name," James said in a sing song voice.

"I just did," she said, jumping the last three steps to get away.

"My first name," James jumped the last five to keep up.

Lily stopped dead and went the opposite direction. James pivoted more quickly than she had hoped, and followed, until the door slammed in his face. He was about to enter when he saw the sign.

"Lily! Lily that's not fair!"

Lily, blocking the other side of the door with her arms spread wide, smiled. The girl's lavatory was one of the best hiding spot for her. Of course, that hadn't always stopped him before. He pounded on the door, "Lily, I'll come in!"

"Go a-way," she shouted back.

"Not a chance," James sounded determined.

"Then skip breakfast!" she countered.

The pounding stopped.

Finally. Peace and tranquility. Sort of. Because she still had the mess in her head to sort out. Part of her was happy she'd won this battle. The other was unhappy about his fickle personality- breakfast was more important than her. Such a boy. She'd thought that that had changed since the beginning of the school year. She sighed, lowering her arms and moving away from the door, tucking her books into her messenger bag. He was still easily deterred.

Or not.

"_Accio_ Lily Evans' bag."

Her messenger bag, which was slung around her neck, suddenly wrenched forward, banging her into the door.

"Ouch! OW!"

The bag was bashing itself repeatedly, whiplashing her back and forth.

She couldn't reach her wand to unjinx her bag- she had to wrench the door open, but not before the door clipped her head, dazing her momentarily.

Outside the door, James caught the bag in his gut, almost missing his opportunity to catch the beautiful red head with open arms. But he didn't.

Lily blinked up at him, her head throbbing, but he was warm, and comforting, and she didn't mind fitting in his arms one bit.

He was surprised at her lack of anger as he held her there, but he took the opportune momentary lapse in her usual lashing, and immediately whisked her away, "Now we can have breakfast together."

She was too surprised- and later she blamed that hitting her head had something to do with her lack of brain-power to do anything but be happy in his warm embrace. She was practically hauled into the Great Hall, because she was having a hard time walking, and was sat down firmly next to James. Across the table Sirius Black dropped his fork.

James' arm was still around her, very warm and very comfortable… _Natural_, she thought, _as though we always did this_. Of course, she excused herself later for thinking this, she was too brain-dead.

"She came 'round?" Sirius asked in utter disbelief.

"Sort of," James shrugged, but then grinned broadly, "I'll take it."

Remus snapped his fingers loudly.

James peered at him perturbed momentarily from his smile, "Moony, what are you doing?"

He did it again in front of Lily's face. She blinked, recalling somewhat of her persona. "You didn't hypnotize her, did you James?"

James grinned down at Lily. "I did put an Accio charm on her bag, and she's been quiet ever since," he said, suddenly frowning at her gawking look and her half awake eyes, "Could it have had an effect on her?"

"She looks like she's dead," said Wormtail, pausing between toast.

"Brilliant, Prongs, you've killed her," Sirius said, waving his spoon at his friend.

James looked up in alarm at that, and back at Lily, worry etching lines in his face. "Are you serious?" James said, shaking her a little as though to jar her awake.

"That's me," said Sirius, who still wasn't concerned past the point that Lily was sitting with his friend. Did this mean James had finally gotten what he'd wanted?

"No, she's not dead, James," Remus said, and waved his wand, "_Renovate_."

She came to, and unfortunately for James, realized where she was.

"Uh oh," Peter said, watching Lily's temper rise and ducked under the table just as Frank Longbottom sat down to say hi.

"What in the name of Merlin made you think that you could jinx my bag, Potter?" she yelled, "You stalk me, jinx me, and then-." She jumped out of the seat beside him, pausing in her speech, and kept going, "What's keeping me from hexing you right now?!"

"My good looks?" James replied with only half the confidence he would have had if it had been anyone else.

Remus hid his forehead in his hand. Sirius was grinning, waiting for rejection, and that good hex so Sirius wouldn't owe Remus as much.

Lily, even though her wand was drawn, wasn't about to be a bad example in front of the entire school (or so she told herself). She huffed angrily, and pointed the wand in between James' handsome hazel eyes where his glasses had slipped down from. His eyes were centered on the wand.

"You're so lucky I'm Head girl, Potter, or else you'd be without your so called good looks," she hissed before stomping off, leaving James to adjust his glasses.

"What'd ja do to 'er, James?" asked the first year sliding her in between Remus and Sirius. (A/N: I know she wouldn't be here yet, but I love her too much, so screw the timeline) Now the only reason that the little girl was sitting next to the Marauders without fear had almost everything to do with her electric blue pig tailed hair. The other part was that she was amusing.

"Tonksie, dearie, I think that the very fact that James was born might have something to do with it," grinned Sirius, tugging one of her pigtails. She stuck a forked tongue out at him.

"Shut up, Padfoot," James said, his hand running through his hair distractedly. Remus was chuckling at Tonks' antics.

"Wha' now?" she asked again, confused.

"Don't mind, Nymphadora. This isn't much to worry about-," Remus started with a smile but Tonks interrupted.

"Don't call me Nymphadora, Remus, or you'll find yourself in next Tuesday," she told him, wand still in her pocket as she continued to put jam on her toast. The only thing that showed her irritation was that violent red highlights dimmed back to blue in her hair.

"Tonksie is an ickle bit nasty this morning, just like another red head we know," Sirius grinned, dodging the piece of toast flung at him. Remus was still smiling.


	3. Explosion

Professor Slughorn had always let her come early to his classes. She was very thankful for it now as she made her way into his classroom. It gave her time to set up her potions kit and finish homework and think clearly. Without Potter.

But they weren't alone. Some detention-ies were there. She was surprised to see that they were seventh and sixth year Slytherins. Knot, Avery and was that a Carrow? Thankfully Malfoy had graduated last year. He'd been bad enough as is.

_Great_, she thought to herself. _Slytherins. Won't they be just delightful._

"Why my dear Lily, how are you doing today, my girl?" Slughorn pronounced proudly, as though she were a Queen entering a ball.

"I'm fine," she told him earnestly, sitting down in her regular spot. _Hungry too. Idiot Potter had to ruin my breakfast. _

Slughorn quirked his head at her from behind his desk, "You look a little pale."

She shook her head, smiling to deviate his attention.

He shrugged at her, looking back to the notes he was writing, "Alright then. We'll be working on Speech Potions today, page two hundred and thirty six?"

She nodded obediently, but pulled out her Transfiguration book instead. Her toughest class, and yet James was a wiz at it. Literally.

James-. No, Potter. _Potter_. Always and forever _Potter_.

She felt so stupid for letting her guard down. Though in her defense she had had a spell cast on her bag, and then gotten clubbed in the head by the door. She realized again what she was thinking about, and tried to distract herself with Transfiguration.

But James somehow found his way back into her mind. James made her feel so stupid sometimes, and so clutzy, and then so beautiful and- uh! Wasn't that why she ran away? Everything was so confusing around him.

A piece of paper slid neatly into her lap, surprising her. She looked at it. _Ah_, patrol schedules. She'd forgotten entirely. Professor Dumbledore had given them to the prefects and the two heads last week. They started today apparently. She had lunch duty with Remus. She and her stomach groaned. Ah well, she could pick up something on the way.

She heard a few snickers on the other side of the room and rolled her eyes, flattening out her Transfiguration book on her desk and placing her notes beside it.

She pulled out a few rolls of parchment and rewrote her essay that was due that day, making sure everything sounded coherent and taking care of rough patches, hoping that writing about it again would help her understand the concept more. It didn't.

She was working so hard on it that she didn't even notice Severus Snape come into the room.

Until he sat down beside her.

She bristled instantly.

"Lils?" he asked hopefully.

"Go away," she hissed, hunching over her work. She hated that she still had classes with him even though they were seventh years.

"Look, hear me out-."

She cut him off, "You've been saying that for two years now and you haven't convinced me yet. You still call me a- a _mudblood_ behind my back, and you hang out with those -," she lowered her voice to a whisper, glancing up at Slughorn who was still writing notes without looking up, "- _Death Eaters_. Don't even say you don't, you're worse than Potter. Go away," she said, hunching over her work.

"Worse then Potter now?" Sev said bitterly, gritting his teeth, "So it's true. You're falling for James Prat Potter. Don't you remember Lils? We used to make fun of his lot!"

"I'm not falling for anyone, _Snivellous_. Go away before I give you detention!" she snapped, her eyes flashing dangerously, meeting her once best friend's eyes. She didn't care that his eyes were sad, or that they were angry. He didn't deserve her pity. He stalked off angrily at his hated nickname. She huffed after him.

She scribbled madly on her parchment, upset that she'd let her guard down. She loathed talking to Se- Snape. She felt guilt and anger at the same time. And he made her want to pull her hair out with frustration. He was evil, like the rest of the Slytherins in the room, who she was pretty sure were all Death Eaters. She'd been so sure that he wasn't and then he'd gone and said all that stuff. At least James wasn't evil. He was…

She found herself embroidering James' name on parchment as the other students came into the classroom. Guiltily she tore off and crumpled the parchment.

Mary and Alice found themselves a seat at her table, smiling at her, and Mary gave her a knowing look. "Lily?"

"What?" she asked sharply, and made to burn the paper with her wand.

Alice snatched it away, and looked at it. "Indulging?" She shook her short haired brunette head at James' inscribed name before Lily snatched the paper back and burned it immediately. "You're the most peculiar person I know. Why won't you just go out with him?"

"Because _he's_ him," Lily slumped down over her Transfiguration work, head in her folded arms.

"Are we talking about _him _him?" asked Mary, twirling her blonde curly locks as she sat down across from them both, "Or your _him_?"

Alice blushed, taking a glance at Frank Longbottom who was sitting at the Marauder table, instead of the Hufflepuff table, a wise choice seeing as everything always blew up in their faces. Frank smiled cheekily at Alice, and she waved timidly back.

Lily looked exasperatedly at her friend, "Now why won't _you_ go out with _him_?"

Alice ducked her head as she sat down, "Because he doesn't like me."

Mary and Lily groaned and gave each other a knowing look.

"He doesn't!" Alice said, determinedly looking at them both.

"Honestly, you two cause too much drama for yourselves," Mary said, sucking on a sugar quill. "And how come you both get Os and I'm stuck with Es and As?"

The bell rang, and Slughorn began with his usual booming, "Good morning, class!" and started right into the lesson, Lily taking adamant notes before they began the practical, where before Mary or Alice could start up about James, she started up on Frank.

Even toward the end of class, they were discussing Alice and Frank.

"You know you're just being stubborn and stupid," said Lily, adding the last of the ingredients with a flourish, "And that you could go out with him right now if you wanted to."

"Shh, Lily, I'm doing my work with this Speech Potion," Alice was biting her lip, narrowing her eyes on her work before her.

"Yeah, hush up for half a sec… how do you do that?!" Mary asked in aggravated amazement.

It was funny how her friends had to concentrate on this stuff. It came naturally to her. When Sev had been her only friend she had assumed it was natural for everyone. Now she knew otherwise. She was stirring her cauldron now, and let it simmer. Even though the book said to keep it at a steady rate, it was cooking too much and it turned a pleasanter shade of blue.

"Perfect as always, m'dear," Slughorn smiled from across the table, wincing away from Mary's potion.

She grinned, and dipped her flask into her potion to give to him when it happened.

The Hufflepuff table exploded in a blinding yellow light, the vapor clouding the room, smeering Lily and the two other Hufflepuffs before Slughorn could contain it.

Lily immediately fainted, her lungs too full of the substance to cough.

(A/N: LoL, sorry, I love cliff hangers though… well, when they're not used on me.)


	4. Speech problems

"Lily!" Mary shrieked, she and Alice fleeing from the smoke. Alice whipped out her wand to help Slughorn clear the air and Mary went immediately to her friend's rescue.

But James had beaten her to it.

The two other students who had also collapsed because of their explosion lay on the floor as Slughorn made to help them, letting Alice de-pollute the air in the class (she had learned this technique after the Big Stink Bomb of the Marauders a few years back. The effects were still ingrained into the walls, ceiling and floor in the fifth floor corridor.)

Lily heard mumbling overhead as she blinked her eyes. She couldn't see properly. Hazel eyes formed, worried, behind glasses as a wand swished over her head.

"_Renevate_."

She looked up at him, fully awake now, and had a silent coughing fit.

James helped her sit up and rubbed her back as she continued to cough without a sound, tears forming in her eyes she spluttered so much. Her throat felt dry and itchy as she swallowed numerous times, James patting her back encouragingly. She sighed when it had passed, wiping away a spilled tear, smiling at her two worried friends that were in her face.

_I'm ok_, she mouthed. And blinked. Her face morphed into a confused expression. _What_? she tried to say.

"Lily, you've got to talk to me," said Alice, cocking her head with her hands on her knees. Mary nodded, and turned her head towards her as though trying to hear her.

_But I _am_ talking to you! Why can't you hear me? Why can't_ I _hear me_?

Her friends puzzled as she mouthed at them noiselessly. She strained her vocal cords, causing another coughing fit, but no sound came out. _Oh no!_ Terror had now replaced the confusion. _What's happened to me?_

She looked at James angrily. _Did _you_ do this?_ she tried to ask.

"Lily, we can't hear you. Are you ok?" he said, innocence on his face before she took a swipe at him. He dodged neatly, hurt however by the gesture. "What did I do!?"

_This apparently_! she mouthed. _Make me better_! _James Potter if you don't give me my voice again I'll strangle- _

"Lily, cut it out, James didn't do anything!" Mary said, Alice helping her as they dragged Lily from James.

_But _he_ did this!_

"What wrong with Lily?" asked James to Slughorn, brushing off his robes.

"She inhaled the yellow aerosol?" Slughorn asked a worried look across his face. Lily blinked, and nodded. What did that have to do with this? "She's taken the ruined speech potion that those Hufflepuffs created. Apparently, she's had an effect, but at least she's not spouting warts."

Lily grimaced at the two other students mouthing wordlessly to each other with warts on their faces and hands.

"Something to do with the toad stools. Get them to the Hospital Wing, you three. You'll receive full credit. Hurry, hurry now, before their conditions worsen. See what Madam Pomfrey can do for her," Slughorn said concerned lines on his face. "And if they can't speak anymore, well, famous people have been mutes, Lily."

Lily's eyes widened in horror. _Never speak again?_

Before Mary or Alice moved, James swept her up in his arms and hurried her out of the dungeon. She was surprised at his sprint as he ran up the staircase. She felt so small in his arms, but then regained her brain, and yelled _I can still walk you know_!… noiselessly. And groaned noiselessly before pouting to herself. That at least everyone did silently.

"Now you're in for it, aren't you?" James said, look down at her with a smirk. "You can't yell at me for anything." She frowned, and folded her arms like a child. But his smile faded, "For a second there I thought you were a goner."

_As if_, she said willfully.

He grinned as she groaned with out a sound.


	5. The Verdict

Madam Pomfrey shook her head at Lily, "Two other students in your condition?" She clucked in disapproval. "Potions class is too risky. Well, set her down on the bed. She can still move for herself, right?" she asked James, with raised eyebrows.

"Oh, right."

Lily blinked in surprise. James Potter went red. She blinked again? Was it an optical elusion? James was never embarrassed… was he?

She thought this over while Madam Pomfrey checked her vitals. "Nothing else seems to be wrong. Speak for me, would you?"

Lily sighed, and said, _I don't understand James Potter_. The words echoed silently around the room but were a fervent chant in her mind.

She couldn't place it, but she thought that Madam Pomfrey smiled, before saying, "I don't have the right ingredients in stock."

_What?_ Lily's mind went blank.

Madam Pomfrey had moved away, muttering to herself, and went to a closet chuck full of little bottles and canisters, and big gooey things that Severus used to show off to Lily. Madam Pomfrey charmed a quill out of thin air, along with parchment, and then the quill began to scribble on the parchment on its own.

Lily however wasn't exactly paying attention. Madam Pomfrey didn't have the cure? She couldn't be mute! She was a girl! _Girls need to talk or we die!_ she told no one.

"But there is a way to get the ingredients, am I right?" James said, concern in his voice. Lily jumped. It was as though he'd read her mind. "If they're expensive, I can pay. We've got money-."

"No, no dear, it's just that we need the thermal juice from a Remorhaz intestine, and that is hard to come by." Lily sighed in relief. She was curable. "If I'm quick enough it'll only take a few weeks, oh, and a Griffin's feathers," she told her quill. She looked back at James and Lily, "You can go now. I see no harm in you leaving."

_Weeks?! _

"-just as long as you come up every day so I can make sure that there are no new developments-."

_WEEKS?!_

"Yes, dear, I'm sorry, but it will take weeks," Madam Pomfrey sighed before turning her back again, "But I'm sure a close friend of yours could interpret your meanings for a while in classes?"

Lily blinked, confused.

"I read lips," she said over her shoulder.

Lily's mouth formed a little "O" of understanding. But then she thought again Weeks? Or even months? _Oh for bloody Mary's step mothers. _

The bell rang, making Lily jump, just as the other two injured came into the ward.

_Look on the bright side_, she told herself as she slid off the sick bed. _At least you don't have warts_.

"Potions is too dangerous a class," Madam Pomfrey mumbled again as she bustled over to the Hufflepuffs.

"C'mon, Lily, we're going to be late," said James emphatically, helping her along by holding her hand. She ripped it away, and crossed her arms, moping out of the Hospital Wing with him.

_It's Evans_, she tried to tell him. She groaned inaudibly before smacking herself on the head. He was lucky he kept a straight face.

"You know it won't be all that bad," he grinned.

She glowered at him. _For you_.


	6. Complications

Lily Evans, three weeks later, was not a happy person. Of course she had been expecting Slytherin taunts, the regular whispering behind the hands that happened when she walked by, but nothing prepared her for everything else.

First off she had to visit Madam Pomfrey every day, which was enough work even of itself seeing as she had to use her free studying time to do it.

And Lily had grown used to the respect of younger years as Head Girl, and wasn't bossy, or rude, but stern. But now that she couldn't enforce her actions with words, she was left to deal with that chaos.

For example two fourth years were playing with a Fanged Frisbee in the hallways (a new acquirement at the joke shop Zonko's that was driving the new caretaker Filch up the wall). Obviously, seeing as the thing was banned Lily charmed it into her hand.

"Hey! That's ours!" called one of the fourth years, running up to her.

She shook her head, communicating that it wasn't allowed.

"What gives you right to take it away? Just 'cause you're a Seventh year doesn't mean nothing!" yelled the other boy, running up to the scene. She stared them down, and pointed at her Head badge.

A dawning expression came over the boy's face, "Oh yeah, you're that Head girl that can't talk."

She mentally rolled her eyes (would she _always_ be known by that?) and nodded.

"Well then," he grinned, and snatched it away from her. She made to call after them in anger, surprised that they were Hufflepuffs and not Slytherins, and chased after the two devious munchkins.

In the end she had to hang them by their ankles in the air and give them detentions. Of course, this was only one of those episodes.

Then, surprisingly, her friends had a terrible job interpreting what she meant. Mary in particular was horrible at it. Her newest fling, a boy named McClain from Ravenclaw, was dangling off her arm as they made their way to Healing class. Lily motioned that she would go on ahead to let the two alone.

Mary frowned at her.

"But Lily, we just went to the bathroom," hissed Mary. "I want to be with Luke right now, ok?"

Lily hid her head in her hands, and went ahead.

"Was she saying she was sick?" came Mary's voice after her.

Alice wasn't as bad, but when she messed up (once and only for the most important time of course), it had been bad. Thankfully Frank had been there.

In Herbology, Lily and Alice had been working on trying to harvest the Echo tree that was found in bogs that called people like lovers to their deaths if heard seeing as it was a cousin of the Mandrake root and the Whomping Willow (thankfully they were now few and endangered because their sap was extremely useful in curing odd diseases and poisons), when after a fierce hacking of Alice's, her left earmuff came partially off. Lily's eye's widened and she motioned to her earmuffs while her teeth were clenched in worry.

"I have something in my teeth?" Alice cocked her head, before freezing as the tree's call took root in her mind. Lily panicked, unable to decide what to do as Alice walked towards the tree's embrace of branches.

Lily dropped the sap bucket she had been holding and tackled her friend as the tree made to pick her up. But then the tree turned violent, and lashed out at Lily before she could do anything else. She saw her friend being sucked in by the roots as Professor Sprout came into awareness of the situation.

"_Imobulus_!" yelled Frank, his wand whipping into view out of no where, and the tree stopped moving entirely.

Alice had had to make a trip to the hospital wing, and Lily had felt extremely guilty and extremely thankful for Frank.

Also Lily's handwriting must have been horrible, since Mary couldn't seem to decipher it. Or maybe the fact that Mary had beautiful handwriting might have something to do with the matter because Alice had no trouble at all with it.

"What'd you mean you want to gorge on Mars? What does Mars have to do with anything anyways? We're in Charms, Lily, stay focused."

"Hey! _I_ like McClain! You can't have him. You get Pott- oof!" (Lily'd luckily managed to put a lid on that one.)

"You got an adequate? Or is that an outstanding? Oh, it's an O. Sorry, Lils. You should think about taking up reformed writing. How does any teacher read this stuff?"

Those were just a few examples of Mary's interpretations.

Plus there was the fact that her teachers were overly aggravating the subject. Or, Slughorn and Flitwick were. And even more than usual, they made her the spotlight.

"Poor Miss Evans, see how she does the charm _without_ muttering under her breathe! Pettigrew! Such is not allowed in my classroom!" yelled Flitwick, with vibrancy. She would bury her face in her hands, and shake her head in embarrassment.

"Perfect, midear, perfect, as always. How is the cure for your ill coming along?"

She would shake her head, but would try to get back to her work… but that never worked, and he would reminisce.

"I remember the time when I was in a fix like this, and then Dr. Asclepius Apol, _yes_ class _the_ Dr. Asclepius Bona Dea Apol…"

Lily and the class would sigh in boredom as he would move into another of his epics of other famous people, being forced to listen because she couldn't ask for a way out of his tales so she could concentrate.

Worse, in McGonagall's class, she was getting all the negative attention. She had always known McGonagall didn't favor her, but now more than ever it was apparent.

"Just because you can't speak doesn't give you reason to do poorly in my class Miss Evans. Try harder," she would say after some kind of explosion and to the snickering of the other class members. Especially James.

Uh! James. _His name should be a cuss word_, she thought avidly as she tried to morph the tank of water into an octopus. At the end of class, when she was still almost entirely unsuccessful, she turned her back.

There was an "ooo" behind her.

She spun to find a green octopus in the place of where her tank had been. Frowning, she looked from her wand to the octopus and back again. How by Merlin had _that_ happened?

McGonagall had noticed as well, "Excellent work, Miss Evans. I'm astounded. Ten points to Gryffindor."

Lily bit her lip as McGonagall walked away. She shouldn't have gotten that. She felt guilty. Alice was giving her a pat on the back, and telling her how excellent she was (because only seven people had managed doing the spell correctly). Lily shook her head, collecting her things from the back of the room, wondering how it had happened.

"It matched your eyes."

Lily jumped, and faced James Potter. She scowled. She really didn't like not having a voice around him. That was one of the two barriers between them. She grabbed her second defense in her pocket. Her wand.

"The octopus. Good thing that you made that in time. We needed the ten points for that match coming up." He winked one of his hazel eyes at her before walking away to join Remus and Sirius.

Lily's eyebrows shot up. _Potter_ had done that?

She was left indignant and shocked as the bell rang. Alice handed Lily her things. _Idiot Potter_. All he thought about was Quidditch and his messy head of hair. Or did he?

All of this together though, really boiled down to one emotion.

Loneliness.

She knew it was stupid to be so lonely, but she had no way of expressing herself, not through lip reading or writing even. She now understood why humans were the superior race because they could communicate so well, and she now felt excluded from it.


	7. More Complications

(A/N: Sorry it took so long. If you like this story, you should check out my other one, called Hermione's Present)

Lily and Alice stalked (well, the latter walked) out of the Transfiguration classroom toward their regular, Alice trying to deter Lily from her thoughts on James. Alice talked animatedly about the Defense Against the Dark Arts essay they had to do on Specters and how to drive them off or send them to the next realm after life, trying to fill the silence politely since Lily couldn't help her with it.

But then Lily told her what she was thinking, on parchment.

_You know what I want_?

"What?" asked Alice after reading the paper.

Lily scribbled, _Duct tape_.

"Duck tape?"

Lily nodded.

Alice gave her an inquisitive expression. "What's duck tape?

_DUCT tape is this sticky stuff that holds things together. It's like a cheap way of a muggle's _reparo_ spell_.

"So why do you want ducked tape?" Alice asked, looking toward her curiously.

_So I can tape people's mouths shut when they're annoying me_, Lily scribbled, and handed her the parchment.

Alice laughed, "You sure are a dreamer, Lils," Alice told her, smiling widely. Lily smiled back at her friend, thankful for her company, but they were stopped by someone.

"Hi, Alice," said Frank, grinning at her hugely.

"Frank! Hi," Alice blinked her surprise.

Lily rolled her eyes, letting her friend hang back with Frank and going ahead- right as she knocked into someone.

She made to give an apologizing smile, when she saw the green lining on their collar. Slytherin, grumbled Lily, and made to push her way around him when someone caught her arm.

"Going to say sorry for that, Evans?" sneered Mulciber, "Or is the Head Girl too proud?" he bore down on her. She glowered, eyes flashing, and made to tug away, annoyed. His smile widened, "Oh that's right, you can't say anything, can you?"

Lily discretely made for her wand, still glaring in defiance and trying to get away. Mulciber was one of the ones she was almost sure was a Death Eater, one of those Voldemort followers that were still in Hogwarts, and while she would never admit it to him, was one of the few people in this school that scared her.

"Look who joined us, Severus," smiled Mulciber twistedly, pulling her around to face the rest of his crowd, "It's the ickle mudblood of yours that you want so much." Lily tried to tug away from Mulciber, grimacing when her arm wouldn't budge.

Sev just stared at her, dumbstruck.

"So hows about a date with your ol' Sev 'ere? He's dreadful lonely without you, isn' that right Ave'?" Mulciber asked, and Avery grinned back at Mulciber.

"Yeah, yeah he is," Avery scoffed, and Lily glowered at him.

"Let her go," Sev- _Snape_ said quietly, not meeting anyone's eyes.

"What?" Avery gaped astonished.

"But here she is, all quiet and pretty-."

Lily finally drew her wand, and pointed it discretely at Mulciber, but someone beat her to the punch.

"_Reducto_!"

The whole hall stopped as Mulciber slammed into the wall. It was Lily's turn to blink as Mulciber fell limply to the floor, out cold as two or three girls shrieked. A mere half second later it seemed someone had a mind that they were dragging Lily away from the scene, running with her in tow until her feet caught up with her.

A few hexes shot past her head, and she ducked. For the first time she was thankful that she couldn't make a sound, or she would have squealed like a sissy.

"Potter!" yelled a couple of angered voices.

They turned the corner together, and kept going, rushing past Frank and Alice.

"Lily?" Alice called after her in surprise.

After they rounded the next corner they stopped, her rescuer pushing her into the wall. Lily was panting, shaking her head. She looked up at her rescuer to find a pair of hazel eyes behind glasses examining her.

"Are you alright?" he asked, anxiety etched in both his face and his voice. She nodded shyly at the ferocity in his eyes before looking away, and then straightened up, disgusted with herself.

_What's the matter with me? I can take care of myself. I'm Head Girl after all, not some helpless first year_. She felt so stupid.

"Don't worry about it. Everyone freezes up sometimes. Just don't do it again," he cautioned. "I might not always be around to watch out for you," he teased.

She blinked. How had he done that? How had he known what she was thinking?

"I've been watching you for years, Lily, I think I can read your expressions well enough," he grinned at her continued bewilderment, "C'mon, I'll take you to your next class."

_I don't need your protection Potter_, she thought scathingly.

"Apparently you do need my help so don't even give me that look. Don't I deserve a thank you after all?" he asked a determined look on his face.

She sighed silently, and nodded at him.

He grinned, "You're welcome."

Ugh, he was so cocky!

She left him standing there, trying to get rid of him. But couldn't.

"Lily," he said to her, still smiling.

She rolled her eyes at him again, and continued to make her way up the stairs, trying to be faster. But how could you beat the best Quidditch captain up the stairs?

Thankfully for the rest of the way they walked in silence. He seemed happy enough. She wondered why. And since when could he read her expressions? Shouldn't that be illegal? Her two best friends couldn't read her mind like he could. _He's a stalker_, she thought to herself. _And yet he was amazing… LILY, you prat, _she yelled at herself. _Don't even think about it_.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked, sounding partially amused.

_Like I'd tell you_, she scoffed.

"Now what did I do?" James asked, looking annoyed at her. She frowned, and shook her head. "And yet you're sometimes so confusing," he sighed as they reached the doorway to her class. "Like how you deal with Ancient Runes. I don't understand it."

She did smile slightly at that.

"Well, have fun, if that's what you want to call it," James said, making a face. Lily out right grinned. He'd still never understand how much she liked to write and read in other languages. In fact, none of her friends understood. But he'd wished her luck.

The bell rang overhead, and Lily made a pained expression. James was late.

"Don't worry. I was going to ditch today anyways," James smiled at her, walking half backwards and waving. She made a horrified look at the thought of the Head Boy ditching class, but he shook his head, laughing at her expression, "It's healthy to ditch class now and then, Lils. Don't have too much fun in there."

_How did he do that? _She wondered to herself, and made a polite half wave back.

He beamed, shoved his hands in his pockets and rounded the corner, out of sight.

_Wow_, she mouthed.

James Potter rescuing her, and leaving her in utter disarray-

"Miss Evans, would you like to take your seat now?"

She blushed as her teacher interrupted her thoughts, and sat down at the back of the class.


	8. Result of the Complications Part 1

A bruise had welled on her arm from where Mulciber had grabbed her, and she ached all day, but waited to heal it. She and Mary were going to study that evening for the upcoming review and this was a perfect way without hurting themselves or ruining the dumbie they were given to practice healing on.

Even though healing bruises seemed minor, they'd only covered it last year. Madam Pomfrey was very particular on teaching the proper way of doing things, so much so that they'd covered basic anatomy of all life-forms their third and fourth year, then fifth year learned how to make potion cures. Finally last year they'd actually gotten to the healing part, but only little things, like cuts and scrapes and aches and bruises, and it was a lot harder than it looked. This year they were getting down to the nitty gritty, and were going to learn how to mend bones, deep wounds and the such.

And Mary, who needed practice on healing bruises, would probably be thankful for her pain later. But the bruise was deep black, and hurt like a troll had been gripping it instead of Mulciber. Of course, Mulciber was part troll in the brain-dead sort of way…

So later in the common room, while Alice was doing some of her DADA homework (which Lily had finished), Lily showed her arm to the pair of them. After some gasps at the black and purple hand mark, and a long explanation in Lily's handwriting, Mary consented, helping Lily roll up her sleeve.

But not before the Quidditch team came back from practice, to Lily's horror. Lately she hadn't been caught dead in the common room with James Potter, except when they had Head duties, because she now had nothing to keep him away but a wand, which wasn't always too extreme.

She had the couch between them, and she ducked, and hoped it would work.

It didn't.

Mary Miss Loud Mouth said, "Lily, let me see your arm, I'll heal it in a jiffy."

Lily put her finger to her lips to motion quietness, nodding her head imploringly in James' direction.

Mary didn't understand, "What? You do want me to heal it, right?"

"Heal what?" James asked, Lily's name snagging his attention enough to have him peering over the couch. Lily started, and slid to the floor, feet in the air, and hit her head on the coffee table. Her friends laughed at their friend's clumsiness as James offered Lily a hand up. She took it, and he pulled her back onto the couch, before he spotted it.

"What in Godric's name did that?" James demanded the ferocity of that afternoon back in his eyes. She shook her head as though to say nothing. He didn't believe her, anger making his jaw rigid, "Lily, what happened?"

She looked away, ashamed, and tried to cover her arm with her sleeve in the same motion. Lily gritted her teeth underneath her lips, feeling stupid, and was thankful for long hair to hide behind.

"Lily-?" he queried again, but Mary interrupted him.

"Apparently that's what Mulciber did. You know, that Slytherin, well, he was bullying her because she can't talk now, and then- _oof_!" Mary was abruptly stopped.

Lily bumped into her, smothering her mouth, grimacing pointedly at her friend.

Lily wasn't about to have James know about her communication problems, all because some misguided idiot move of hers. That was the _last_ thing Lily wanted James to be involved in. She had to figure it out for herself until the cure came around.

Lily looked back up to find James, but he was gone.

Lily sat up, horrified.

"Ow, Lils, seriously, what's your deal lately? S'not like he's gonna jinx you or anything," Mary was saying. Lily only had eyes for James, who was stalking toward the portrait hole.

"Prongs?" Sirius said, standing as his friend passed and followed him out of the portrait hole. Lily jumped over the couch's back, stumbling less gracefully than she'd hoped, regained her balance, and followed Sirius' heels as Remus and Peter came down the stairs from the boy's dormitory.

"Padfoot?"

The portrait hole swung to a close.


	9. Result of the Complications Part 2

(A/N: I want to say thank you so much for you all that review. You have no idea how much I appreciate your say. I'm really glad you like it. It's my second fanfic after all. Thanks a ton!)

James had practically lost it. His vision was blurred with anger, and his head pounded with thoughts of revenge.

_They'd hurt Lily_.

He'd barely tolerated earlier this afternoon, but Mulciber had left a mark. _A mark_, on Lily Evans' arm. Now it was James' turn to make a mark back. He didn't care if there were more of them, or that he would probably be suspended from Hogwarts at the least. They'd hurt Lily. And that was the last mistake they'd ever make.

As Head Boy he knew the password to get into that slimy dungeon of theirs, and now they were going get more than detention for taking advantage of his Lily.

He heard footsteps running behind him, but disregarded them. Fury captivated his mind. He didn't care if he was being irrational. He was out for blood.

"Prongs!"

Sirius was by his side, and after reading his expression instantly knew what he felt. Sirius knew that James wouldn't be patient now, and Sirius wasn't about to stand in the way. He wouldn't hinder. He would help. Because Sirius was more than just a best friend. He was a brother. And together they might survive the night, and they'd be suspended, but at least they'd be together. Through thick and thin, best friends, brothers.

"Wait for me, you idiot. You can't go gallivanting off all by yourself," Sirius said, trying to sound light but he didn't even smile. James was glad for it. Brothers to the end.

But then there was another pair of feet.

Remus? James couldn't deal with Remus' rationalizations right then.

But then red hair whipped into view, startling him.

She stood right in front of him, arms wide, glowering, making James pause for a moment, and then he moved past her. He ignored her expression, and didn't look at her, because he knew then that he'd stop even longer.

Something tugged on his hand.

He turned to face her, and did pause, his anger dwindling for a moment. She glowered at him with those beautiful green eyes, and shaped words with her entrancing mouth that never came. She bit her lip in self consciousness for a moment, deterred. And then made the mistake of trying to drag him away. The spell was broken. He ripped his hand away.

She wanted him to stop? Not to defend her? They wouldn't make a habit out of bullying her if he had anything to do about it. They were going to be stopped here and now.

He had heard them making fun of her speechlessness in class, or cat-calling to her in the courtyard during break. Remus- not here now thankfully- was and always would be the voice of reason when James felt like hexing them into oblivion But now? This was the last straw (and Remus wasn't here). She was being a silly Head girl as usual, making sure he didn't get into trouble. But didn't she see? Suspension didn't matter if justice was served.

She was suddenly in front of him again, knocking him back, and her momentum flattened him out, sending her flying over him.

Groaning, sitting up, he couldn't help but to be startled by her force. How strong was she?

Lily had put her all into that shove she realized as she rolled to a stop. She wasn't willing to hex him- and the fact that she'd left her wand in the common room might have added to her decision. And she wasn't willing to let herself be some sissy so James had a reason to attack the Slytherins- he'd lose his position as Head Boy, might even be suspended! And she wasn't about to be the cause of that.

She got up quickly, surprised for a moment that she'd actually bowled him over, and tried to hide her pathetic sounding panting as she stared down the pair of Marauders.

"Bugger it, Evans, he's only trying to protect you," Sirius barked, helping his friend up, who was almost as stunned as she was. At first she didn't believe him, and would have retorted scathingly, but the conviction in Sirius' eyes convinced her. "Don't you see? He's defending you."

And she was confused by that. Why defend her? Sure he claimed to fancy her, but not enough to be so rash about it as to consider "protecting" 'd been so sure that he'd just wanted to pick a fight with the Slytherins, and here she was, an excellent excuse.

She looked to James. Did he really care about her that much as to risk his schooling? No. No way. And yet-. His eyes-.

She didn't know what to make of it.


	10. Understanding

Puzzlement was etched in her features, but something else too. Something he couldn't figure out in the few seconds that her eyes were connected with his.

"Lily?" Sirius queried, interrupting James' own thought, Sirius looking as surprised as James felt. He stupidly let his eyes shift to Sirius, and then looked back at Lily, but her bright red hair was whipping around like the rest of her.

"Lily!" he felt his own voice carry after her, before his feet realized that they needed to move. To follow her. All his rage was forgotten, completely and totally gone. He wanted to discern the features, the inexplicable look in her eye. And he had to catch her.

Behind him he didn't hear Sirius' low oath as he slid his wand back into his pocket as the ten o' clock bell rang over head.

She was so confused. All her life she'd thought James was only a skirt chaser, a person without dedication or principal or- anything. She had known he was loyal when it came to friends- but girls? He was as fickle as they come. And now here he was doing something totally and completely outrageous, for her. Was it all for her? Was it a show? Or had she won that loyalty? That loyalty that she'd craved from any relationship that she'd ever wanted.

She heard him catching up. She'd disregarded the fact that her feet were taking her away from the confusion, like a doe in muggle automobile's headlights after they slammed to a stop and waited for the wide eyed creature to move. Now she wasn't sure if she wanted to stop dead and question the life out of him until not even verita serum could tell her more, or if she was too afraid that it was all a lie and wanted to pretend that it wasn't. So, her feet ran faster, her fear greater than her curiosity.

But he was a Quidditch captain, and she, even though she considered herself less than a weakling, wasn't going to be faster than him.

She gave in.

She skidded to a stop at the Fat Lady. And waited.

James was not surprised as at her endurance as he sprinted to keep up with her as he was to see her stop. Again he had to wonder how much strength the girl really had hidden inside as he slid smartly to a stop, twisting himself around her to meet her face.

She was looking at her shoes, panting, as he was.

Now that he was here he didn't know exactly what to say to her. They waited in an excruciatingly long silence, James so intent to hear what she had to say.

She glanced up at him, and opened her mouth, wordlessly asking a question. A question that was easy to read in her face as well as the anxiety and the fear and the look he didn't understand.

She looked away when no sound was emitted to the silence.

"It's yes," he whispered to her.

Her head whipped round, with a new puzzled expression.

"Yes, yes, and yes again. You think that'd I'd have waited around this long for something as trivial as-." Here he paused, and she turned as red as her hair. "Lily Evans, yes."

She was not biting her lip again, but suddenly her hand reached out, and her expression was antagonizing indescribable. He closed his eyes, wondering what was going to happen. Was she going to hit him?

But instead he felt her hand brush his cheek. In a moment it was gone but her fingers left a searing mark that was oddly cool.

He opened his eyes, and his stomach twisted at her amazing smile.

"What are you lot doing out here so late at night?" The new caretaker barked, and they zapped apart like he'd cast a hex between them. Almost as menacing as a troll (and as bad smelling too) Argus Filch strutted up to them.

"That's righ'. You lot are in trouble now. Wha'll it be? Detention?"

"We're Heads, Filch, if you didn't get the memo," James said, angrily. He was having a moment here, a ground breaking, no, ground shattering moment with the person he loved and this squib was totally unwelcome to it.

"Really?"

James rolled his eyes and showed him his badge, Lily copying him with a smile that glinted beautifully in her eyes.

The caretaker grumbled irritably, and left, walking stiffly.

As soon as he was gone, James turned back to Lily, who was still smiling.

The air caught in his throat. She was so beautiful, her hair wind blown from the run, and her eyes sparkling in the castle torchlight and she was smiling at him, and a little red at the same time, making her few freckles a tad too invisible for his liking.

He allowed himself to be led passively back into the common room, the whole escapade from before totally lost from his mind for the time being, with Sirius tailing behind the both of them at a much slower pace. Later, James thanked him for the privacy.

"Like I gave you any of that!" he laughed at James as he made to pull the curtains around him that night. "I was watching from the corner the whole time."

"_What?!_"


	11. Transfiguration Fluff

From that night on for two weeks you couldn't see Lily without James, taking her to class, sitting by her at meals, studying with her in the library, and talking to her in the court yard and common room.

He would do all the talking, and she would smile. Or roll her eyes or look like she was laughing, or mockingly upset (which sometimes scared him for a half second until she would laugh at him), never truly unhappy in his presence.

No one- no one but their friends, that is- knew what to make of it. Lily had hated James. What in the world had he done to make her like him? Some people whispered about love potions, and the girls that were jealous would say that it was a prank to make them all mad so that they'd like James more. But no one really thought that Lily had really fallen for James.

"He must be a good kisser," thought some as they walked passed, Lily smiling, the smile never relaxing until he was gone, at which point she would pout unless there was another of her friends with her.

But she did like him- immensely. Ever since she had seen this deeper loyalty for her in him she barely had a reason to stay away from him, so she didn't.

Alice and Mary were happy for her, and talked about it constantly, Mary a tad jealous, seeing as she had the so called "rad-est" boy in the school. (Which she did, in Lily's opinion, but she kept that to herself).

After the first week, after he still waited for her in the common room, after he continued to want to be next to her, she became even more glued to his side, happy to listen to him talk and walking with him wherever he went. Head duties no longer seemed like they would be a trial, and she was always so excited when he was leaning just to the side of her classroom door, smiling when she came out.

And more than ever now she wished she could talk. She wanted to tell him everything, and explain to him why she hadn't understood before, and why she liked him and- oh the list went on.

Now that she sat by him in most classes, his charms and potions (or should she say screw ups) made her laugh, well, _silently_ laugh (she was beginning to hate the word). He always seemed to miss an ingredient in potions, or throw something off entirely in charms. And then Lily would always help him out.

Of course they were even in the matter. Transfiguration was a mess for her, and she wasn't so good in DADA either. Then it was his turn to laugh.

Once in Transfigurations they were trying to turn large, inanimate objects, into small animals, like mice. Lily and Alice had the honor of trying to turn a desk into a mouse, and were failing miserably.

James- amazing as he was- got the spell within a few tries, and Professor McGonagall boasted of his ingenuity.

Lily, however, rubbed a bit of soot off her cheek. She'd made an explosion of her own, and Alice was helping her to her feet as Lily noticed James looking worriedly at her as McGonagall barred his way unintentionally.

"Miss Evans, I suggest you try again- without tarnishing the desk anymore-," she added, mending the missing side of the desk, "please." Lily stuck her otherwise useless tongue out at McGonagall's back that caused a few giggles. Alice straightened her smile, and tried again at the desk. Nothing happened.

"It's hopeless," Alice sighed, sitting on her stool.

Lily nodded in agreement, looking around for James' at their table (this being the only class he couldn't sit by her due to McGonagall's strictness). But surprisingly, James wasn't there helping Sirius or Remus. She peered around the room, puzzled.

Someone lifted her hand.

"With this spell, it's better to hold your wand like this, and concentrate on the molding of the spell, not on the being like the book says," he whispered in her hair, making her shiver, and shy away.

"Watch," he conducted her hand, and she felt the magic for a tiny, shocking moment, flow from him to her out of the wand. And there sat a mouse, perfect and hazel, rather like James' eyes.

He just grinned at her delight. "Now you try." He said, letting the mouse mold back into a table to her chagrin.

She bit her lip, and gripped the wand like he told her.

"Now," he said.

She waved her wand. Nothing happened.

"Concentrate, Lily," he said, whispering to her again. It tickled. She smiled a tad, but then tried to do as he said. _You try and concentrate when someone like you is breathing in your ear_, she thought.

Before she did it.

The mouse still had a wood pattern and a slightly smoking tail but otherwise seemed perfectly fine.

"Excellent, Lily," he told her, looking almost as happy at her as she was about her accomplishment. She was about to hug him-

"Mr. Potter, I do believe that would be cheating."

They jumped away from each other like kids getting caught stealing cookies. Lily blushed and ducked her head. She felt silly, but wouldn't let McGonagall get her down.

"I don't know Professor, I'd call it assistance." He never missed a beat. Even with her voice Lily couldn't have replied that well, not when being faced with McGonagall's penetrating glare. She admired him for his cool head in moments like these.

"Really Potter?" she asked with a knowing look, "Then I suggest you help Avery and Snape over there. Their struggling with it almost as bad as Miss Evans here." McGonagall, knowing James wouldn't ever do such a thing, swept away. But the damage was done. James gritted his teeth, glancing at the two in the back of the room.

Lily shook her head hard, and caught his wand arm before he could leave her to go back to the other Marauders. She met his eyes imploringly, hoping her expression told him what she was thinking, and then smiled, to pacify him.

The two Marauders were looking at them interestedly and talking in mutters, however, while Alice chatted animatedly with Frank as they tried to master the spell.

James sighed, "Well, I guess you've got it now. Let's see you do it again."

She repeated the spell, and James gave her praise while hugging her around the shoulders. Lily blushed again.

"What are you doing this weekend?"

She blinked, surprised at him, then shrugged, wide eyed.

"Well," he said, sounding nervous, pushing her hair back with his hand, "Would you come with me to Hogsmeade?"

Lily, who was startled for an incomprehensible moment, didn't respond.

"I mean I understand if you don't want- this being new and all- and with me being a prat- right? But, it doesn't have to be romantic or anything- like friends- Lily, what are you thinking?"

Lily was startled at his quick cover ups, because going to Hogsmeade with him was what she wanted to do. But why wasn't her head nodding?

Now she moved it, up and down, vigorously, hoping to regain his enthusiasm. She smiled as if to say _Of course, what else would I want to do_?

His face broke into a perfect award winning James Potter smile. What else could she do to that? She smiled right back.


	12. She Said Yes

She said yes! She said yes!

James ran through the halls to get to his class.

She said yes!

"She said yes!" he chorused to the tardy bell as it rang.

"Late again, Mr. Potter?" demanded a voice as he sat down next to Remus.

"Sorry sir, bladders a mess," shrugged James, but the smile he gave reached from his head to the tips of his toes. Of course his bladder was a mess, but for an entirely different reason than what his explanation seemed.

"Next time, Mr. Potter, I will give you a detention."

But Remus could tell James really didn't care.

So he had to ask as the Care of Magical Creatures teacher went on about phoenixes. He tore a lined sheet of parchment out of his notebook and began to write.

_So what happened?_ Remus penned and slid the paper to James (who was as content in not listening to the Professor at the front of the class as he was content in breathing).

Remus was surprised at his cheerful attitude he wore on his sleeve as he wrote. He normally only played the confident look-at-me-I'm-amazing card. Something must have happened with Lily. That or James and Sirius had pulled an absolutely spectacular prank without Remus in the short span of ten minutes. Remus chose the first (however in previous times he would have chosen the second).

_**She said yes! **_

That explained a lot. There was no question who she was in this reference, just what had happened.

_Lily said yes to what?_

_**To the date I offered. It's this Hogsmeade weekend.**_

_A down right miracle. What did you threaten her with?_

_**Moony, that's not in the least amusing. **_

_And yet- _

**_You're putting a damper on my good mood. Either be happy for me or cut it out. I'm going to glow in my happiness until Lunch which then I will revel in it. _**

_Does Sirius know?_

**_Not yet, but I can change that. _**

James pulled out sneakily from his pocket the mirror that was always on hand. Remus looked away.

Remus had always longed for one, to be part of the pack of two. But it was a two way mirror, and there hadn't been an invention for a three way (four if you counted Wormtail) mirror yet. But he still wanted one. Of course there was no way he would ever say that out loud. He would never have the friendship that James and Sirius had. They were brothers, and he the cousin, even though a favorite cousin, a cousin all the same.

_And anyways_, he chastised himself, _I'm always with one of them to talk in the thing so there is no reason to be so pratty about it all_.

He watched as James did something to make Sirius' image pop up.

"What's up, mate?" he whispered.

"She said yes!"

"What was that Mr. Potter?" the professor called, making Remus and James jump.

"Not a thing, sir. I was telling MacDonald to hush it," James said, winking at Mary, who for a moment had looked indignant but relaxed with a slight smile on her face. Remus shook his head. How James did it only Sirius knew, or maybe James got it from Sirius.

The professor who didn't believe a word of it turned back around and went on with the lecture.


	13. Frank's Frankness

"James taking Lily? You've got to be kidding," said Alice to Frank as they walked to lunch. "She's just really happy with him right now is all."

"No, seriously, I heard them talking about it in the hall. James and Sirius I mean," Frank told her. She gave him the squinted eyes and cocked her head. _No way_ was written all over her face. "I promise," he said holding up his hand.

She smiled and shrugged it off. "I'll ask her later. You never know what Potter and Black have in mind."

Frank frowned a bit.

They kept walking toward the Great Hall.

Frank watched Alice walk on with such beauty and grace. He really was mad about her. No one understood this, not even himself. He would even say he was madder about her than James was about Lily. He was just a tad more subtle about the whole thing. He didn't know how to tell her either, and what if she didn't like him back? What if there was no connection between her and him and that he pretended that she liked him back.

She looked at him with a puzzled expression, her short dark hair flowing in waves behind her. She carried her books in both her bag and her arms. She said it was so she could build up muscle. He had offered to carry them for her, but she wouldn't let him.

"It's so when I trip I'll be able to catch myself," she would laugh.

And he would think to himself _I'd catch you_.

Today he was going to do something he hadn't done before. He wiped his sweaty hands on his robes.

"Hey, Alice?"

Was his voice too squeaky?

"What?" came the simple reply.

"Um, would you- would you come talk to me fo-for a moment?" Merlin he had to get so bloody nervous right now.

"Of course."

He motioned to a secret passageway.

She followed him, and when he stood off to the side she went first.

"What do you want to talk to me about?" Those big round curious dark eyes.

He licked his lips.

"Well," he swallowed, and drew in a breathe, "Would you come with me to Hogsmeade this weekend?"

She blinked at him.

He said less confidently, "Please?"

A grin spread across her face. Was that a yes? Or a mocking no?

A few more tantalizing moments, and then she was hugging him. He heard the crash of books behind her, and a few papers slipping out of the air as she held him. He hugged her back after a bewildered moment, and pulled her off her feet.

She laughed in delight.

They regained their footing (after she about fell over) and he helped to pick up her books. It was quiet except for her humming. He didn't feel awkward or silly or stupid as he had feared. In fact, he was wondering why it had taken him so long to do it.

Lily's eyes were as round as saucers. They said _REALLY?!_

Mary said it for her.

"REALLY!? You have to tell us everything. What was it like?"

"Honestly, you'd think I'd never been on a date before," Alice said, blushing all the same. She had waited to tell them, to let Lily have her moment in glory seeing as she was going to Hogsmeade with James Potter after all.

Now the problem was- what in Merlin's name were they going to wear?

They'd searched high and low, through their closets and trunks, under their beds and even in the bathroom. Nothing whatsoever.

"Well, are you going to tell us or not?" Mary demanded for Lily and herself.

"It was just so sudden I guess. He was really nervous, but that's fine. I like it when he's himself… I dunno, I'm just elated- that means happy, Mary (at which point Mary threw a pillow at her friend with a "HEY!") and all." Alice ducked the pillow.

"So now we have to find you an outfit too," said Mary, "But since Lily is so bleeding picky-."

"Hey be nice!" said Alice in a laughing way.

But Alice actually did prove easier to find an outfit for (as they were searching for Lily as well). She settled on something that she thought that Frank would like, but what Frank would like was almost her ordinary school wear. She didn't mind half as much as Mary, who thought the whole thing dull (as she held up something like a zebra stripped boot).

Lily flopped on her bed, totally depressed. She still had found absolutely nothing. Of course this was her first date. Her other chances of other guys had been either run off by James, or run off by James.

"You are most definitely hopeless," Alice told her, laying her outfit out lovingly on a chair next to her bed.

"I would say," Mary agreed, slouching on her bed. "And you promised to help me with the charms homework."

Lily waved her hand submissively, grabbing her wand.

WHAT WAS SHE GOING TO WEAR?!

The others were asleep and she was searching in the deep depths of her trunk.

Nope, no, never, maybe… no, no, no, no, NO! Where was she supposed to find a yes? She looked high and low, using a low _lumos_ to find where she was.

She wanted something green.

Something not muggly (which was half of her clothing).

Something witchy (not in the bad sense).

Something appealing.

Something that was obviously entirely impossible to find.

And then she found it. A green and black striped shirt, with a purple square patch on the corner, and it was perfect. She had cut the edges in the traditional triangle like one did a jack-o-lantern in her fourth year. Quickly she compiled the shirt with a matching outfit. Her regular school outfit would do with this shirt instead of the other shirt. Or maybe it was because it was midnight thirty and she was dead on her feet that it worked so well.

Praising Merlin at her fortune she finally laid out her outfit in a messy pile and crawled into bed.


	14. Not an Exception

Lily looked at the pair of them inquiringly. They were looking at her outfit- her perfect shirt in particular- with disdain.

_What?_ she wanted to ask.

"Lily, there's a huge yellow stain," Mary said bluntly.

It was the morning of the Hogsmeade trip, and she was in trouble. She had been late getting up, her hair was completely unmanageable, and now the perfect shirt was ruined. She looked down at the mustard stain, and remembered why she'd stopped wearing it. An outing with Petunia and her boyfriend, Dursely, last summer, or was it the summer before that?- and a waiter spilling her American hamburger down her front.

She sighed. This was just too difficult. _Maybe I'm really not supposed to go out with him. Maybe Fate's telling me not to go for it…_

"But, luckly, I can fix this," said Alice, smiling.

Lily looked up, her green eyes bright. Fix it?

"Just hold still for a mo', and we'll have it off by the time you can say The Jack-o-Lanterns," Alice said, whipping out her wand.

That'll be a long time, sighed Lily inwardly.

"But she can't talk-," Mary began to protest.

"I was speaking metaphorically," said Alice, and with a flick of her wand, the yellow stain was gone. Lily searched the shirt as if to make sure that it really was gone and it hadn't jumped onto another part of her shirt, then flung herself at Alice.

James Potter was not a happy camper.

He was sitting on the arm of a couch, and tapped his foot. He was so afraid of being stood up. That would be a much better prank than he'd ever pulled.

The stress was eating him and he wasn't sure if he could take it.

Everyone had gone down to the Great Hall, eating breakfast.

Everyone except James Potter and the seventh year Gryffindor girls. And Frank. He was sitting nervously in a corner- far more nervous than James. However, Frank was a comfort. He knew Alice liked Frank. It was easy to see. That meant that Alice would come to Frank sooner or later, which would mean that maybe something was keeping them up or something. Maybe.

When Alice and Mary walked downstairs, James looked expectantly around them in the shadows. They giggled annoyingly.

"She's coming-," was all they'd say.

Frank and Alice left arm in arm while Mary walked alone. He wondered if he would be doing the same.

What if she didn't come?

What if this had all been a set up and Sirius was going to pop out and yell "Ha ha!" in point two milliseconds? How were you supposed to cope with nerves?

And it wasn't like this was his first date or anything. He'd had other girls when he'd given up on Lily for a day or two for the heck of it, mostly due to Sirius. His excuse was it was practice for this moment… that she was ruining by being so late.

He'd begun to pace for the six millionth time when it happened.

He heard foots on the stairs.

James' head shot up, running to the staircase.

She descended the staircase like everyday- and like everyday it was so beautiful. And worth his wait. He was relieved when those emerald eyes shimmered when they lighted on him, and the smile, and the red hair. He didn't even notice the clothes.

He sighed almost audibly.

But then with a wicked smile stepped on the first step of the girl's staircase. The steps turned into a smooth slide, and Lily, with what would have been a yelp of surprise if she could make a sound, slipped down the rest of the stair. He swooped her up in his arms, and encircled her. Wide eyed, and mouth gaping, she was spun around until that surprised expression turned into a grin.

When he stopped, she tried to give him the _You are in so much trouble Potter_ look.

"What are you going to do with me, Evans? Give me detention?" he asked, carrying her away. He shouldered his way through the portrait hole.

_Maybe. _Said the look on her face.

"It was only a harmless prank," he said, faking innocence.

She would have laughed.

He laughed with her.

_I demand to get down_.

"But then you'd foil the fun of me carrying you. You already ate up my nerves. I thought you were going to ditch me for something more entertaining," he smiled in a relieved fashion.

I don't normally leave people hanging.

"I'm glad I'm not an exception."


	15. The First First Year EVER

They held hands through out breakfast, having a good conversation with out words from one of the company, but with James as an interpreter the entire thing ran mainly smoothly.

However they didn't very much join in the conversation of the others until Sirius demanded it.

"'Lo! Earth to Prongs!"

He came out of laughing, and blinked through his glasses at Sirius. "Wha'?"

"We're meeting up in The Three Broomsticks around two-ish. That little fourth year whats'er name Rosmerta? Yeah, well, she said she'd show us 'round, and since her folks run the place maybe we'll get a private room if I get 'er right," Sirius winked at James, who smirked while shaking his head.

"We'll be there," James promised, nodding to them. Lily nodded with him excitedly, her smile big and her eyes happy.

Sirius didn't make a face until James had regained Lily's attention.

"What?" Remus said.

"Well, s'not like he would actually give me the time of day," he sighed. But his eyes lighted on Remus, "But you'll be with me."

"Give me a break," said the little girl next to him in an exasperated tone, nudging a piece of bacon with her fork.

The seventh year threw her a contemptuous glance.

She didn't even look up, but flipped her pig tailed neon yellow hair out of her face. "You've had plenty of time to talk to him. I'm sure if you engaged him in conversation right now he'd be completely obliged."

Remus and Sirius just gaped. The girl didn't even look up from adding cinnamon to her porridge. Remus had to admit, this girl had a way with Sirius that not even James had. Of course, family ties and all…

But Tonks had more to say.

"Plus, you're making it out like he's the rotten one. Hell-o, it's his first date with the love of his life, and here you are making yourself out to be the victim because he wants to have some fun with her. And not that kind of fun you pervert." She spooned porridge in her mouth. "He'll still be your best friend no matter what."

Sirius blanched, "I know that!"

"Then why are you making such a fuss?" she demanded, but apparently it was a rhetorical question because, "Can you sneak me out?"

"What?" both Remus and Sirius were completely confused at this point.

"Look, you're not both daft, or at least Remus isn't," she said, now looking imploringly at the both of them. "I want to go to Hogsmeade too."

"You can't," said Sirius, stating the obvious, "You're a first year."

"But I can make myself look older when we get there, right?" she continued as though they'd agreed and now were finishing the details. "So then I can go see that new store, Zonkos, isn't that what it's called?"

"Yes, but no," said Remus, "and anyways, how do you expect us to sneak you out? Just wondering…"

"You're the Marauders. You can do loads of stuff, and anyways, you lot sneak out all the time at night. I've seen the lot of you at it, so don't even pretend that you haven't, alrigh'?"

"You have?" said Remus, astonished, though a shadow crossed his face. Tonks barely had time to register it.

Sirius knew that shadow and sighed in anger. He hit his cousin upside the head. She barely kept her nose out of her porridge from the force of his blow. She sat upright, her hair dangerously and vividly red.

"What the bloody-," she began, her face livid.

"You've ruined my company for the day," he said, nodding without looking at Remus. Remus blinked. When had this turned to him?

"What've I done that you 'aven't?" she demanded.

"Thanks, Tonks; you've done me a real favor. First talk to me about not ruining my friend's time then ruin my friend's time," Sirius said, but Remus could tell he really wasn't actually mad anymore.

"I haven't ruined anybody's time," she said, her hair loosing it's red. A smile played on her lips. "And if I have," she looked at Remus, giving him an "I'm Sorry" look, "I'm going to make it up to them right now."

Remus saw her grip the bowl, his face breaking out into a smile.

The _first_ first year to _ever_ pull a prank on the infamous marauder Sirius Black.

Nymphadora Tonks poured her porridge all over the seventh year while everyone that was in the vicinity looked their way.

For a moment the whole world stopped.

Until Remus laughed.

Full blown by himself out in the open laughter. The area around them seemed to have gotten so quiet that everyone jumped when he laughed.

Sirius came back to his senses as Tonks seemed to sit down, but in reality was picking up her bag, ready to run, and as cold porridge dripped from his once perfect hair onto his nose.

"You prat!"

She ducked the blow that came her way, and sprang out of the chair, nearly unseating poor Peter who took the next blow that was meant for the neon yellow haired girl, sprinting for her life for the Marble staircase.

Remus stood, still laughing, to follow to make sure there was no real damage to Nymphadora when James finally got his attention.

"How did that happen?"

"Nymphadora-," was all he could say before following them.

James made a face, and thought guiltily if he should go follow, and decided against it. Sirius would understand. He had his first date with Lily, and he'd make it up to him later.

Lily was still laughing at the scene as were a few others.

That was going to be a priceless moment James would use as blackmail for the rest of his life.


	16. Quite a Gentleman

A/N: First I want to thank you all for over 100 reviews. You have no idea how cool that is! And also I want to say since I now have 100 reviews I can FINALLY as Holy Cross Baby puts it "let them have their date!"

"So," James asked Lily as they walked together down to Hogsmeade, "What do you want to do first?"

Lily made an _I don't know_ sort of face. Apparently she hadn't given this much thought.

"Well, I know where I want to go. Before we head to Diagon Alley we should go to Honeydukes. What'd you say?"

_Diagon Alley? _Her puzzlement was plain to see. James grinned a wicked smile, and shook his head. Lily had lived by the rules her whole life. The thought that they could apparate to somewhere else while in Hogsmeade probably had never crossed her mind.

"Oh c'mon," he explained, his hazel eyes alight, "I'm a marauder, and you're dating me, so _of course_ we have to go somewhere more exciting than some _normal_ chap's regular routine date. If we time it right, we can shop for a while in Diagon Alley, have a picnic on some famous muggle site that you choose, and then we can be back here in time to go to the Three Broomsticks with a bit to spare," he couldn't help but want to snicker at Lily's gaping face. The Head Girl looked at him as if she'd never heard anything so rebellious in her whole life let alone actually doing anything like it.

"We're going, whether you like it or not," he said, sounding teasing. "I have the whole day mapped out. It's going to be fun, Lily. Please?"

She bit her lip and looked away, her red hair hiding her expression.

He was completely surprised. He hadn't foreseen this. Not at all. He'd pictured Lily going on with the plan as smoothly as a broomstick ride.

But then Lily looked back at him with a mocking smile, plainly saying

_Got you_!

James gaped at her, "Lily Evans, you should be completely ashamed of yourself."

_Why?_ She grinned delightedly, cocking her head inquisitively.

"Because you just terrified and pranked your first date," he said, "I'm not sure that should be aloud… oh wait, I did that too," he grinned as she laughed noiselessly, and hoisted her over his shoulder, reveling in the momentary look of surprise and horror on her face before she couldn't see those green eyes over his shoulder anymore. Her quiet protests were quite vocalized as she- not brutally- beat her fists on his back. "It's only fair. You got me, and now I'm only partially getting repaid.

"But I'll be merciful. For now." He let her down so she could look somewhat respectable as they walked into Honeydukes. She flattened her hair and skirt as though they were out of place before James opened the door for her so they could join the throng of students already within the store.

They browsed the shelves, looking for something eatable.

"Hm, what to get, what to get?" he said, voicing both of their ideals. James looked at the interesting candies, and then the pranks, and then the regular candies. He would pick out a few, and ask Lily what she thought. She'd shrug, or look inquisitive, or nod her head and grin, or make a repulsed face (only once about the make your own baked boogie brownies kit) and move away from him. They did get the last of these for prank material later, and other things.

Lily sometimes wandered away, only to bring back something to add to her modest stash. Apparently she was buying her family things, because she pulled out a list once or twice to double check.

Finally James asked if Lily was done, and she nodded. As they got in line they had a good laugh at some of the third years whose expressions were completely elated and sad, because everything looked so good and they didn't have enough money for it all.

Lily pointed to herself and then at the third years, meaning

_I was like that too_.

"Yeah, I think we all were. So many sweets with out a grown up in sight to chastise us… well, at least I was the first time."

What do you mean?

"Well, being the Marauders we are, we found a secret entrance, but I'll tell you more about that later. You don't get every secret on the first date. I have to keep you guessing so you'll stick around."

Lily rolled her eyes, but smiled all the same.

They were next in line to the checking account.

"Next," smiled the nice lady. Lily grinned, and stepped forward. Both she and James laid their goods on the table, and the lady kept a neon green tab in the air. She packaged the goods, and said, "That'll be six galleons and seven sickles for you, and twenty four galleons, eight sickles and ten knuts for you, sir."

"Altogether then," said James, pulling out a handful of galleons. Lily stuck her hand out, with her correct amount of money, stubbornly. "Put it away, Lily, my treat," he said, smiling, and the lady took his money. Lily looked imploringly at the lady.

"A right young gentleman you have there, miss," smiled the lady, and handed James back the change. Lily blushed a little, but then made to hand James the money. He merely grabbed their bags and headed out of the shop.

Lily frowned, and followed, still holding out the money.

A wind hit them hard. Halloween decorations blew past them and into the streets beyond. Lily shivered, but then tucked the money in James' upper pocket.

"Lily Evans you take that money back right now or you'll wake up with green hair tomorrow," he said, dead serious but not angry. She folded her arms stubbornly, but also to keep away the cold.

She shook her head.

"So bloody stubborn. I hope France isn't this cold," he shivered. "We'll just have to buy cloaks in Diagon Alley."


	17. Plastic Lemonade Bottles

Now James Potter was carrying too much. His hands were full from the trip to Diagon Alley. Of course the cloaks James had bought for them were on, as were the gloves and scarves. (Lily's attire was a deep green that was almost black. James' was red, almost a burgundy color.) But the other items such as the picnic items weren't as easy. Now they weren't heavy, they just got in the way of holding Lily's hand, which was more aggravating than any heavy load could ever be.

But now James could tell Lily was feeling guilty about the presents. He had plenty of money. His father was the Head Auror in the Ministry, and they had a family line of riches. Money was never the issue in his house. It was just always… there. Here she was being silly and worrying about her debt, and James was trying to convince her that she was being completely silly.

"You can pay me back later," he said, exasperatedly. She looked at him hopefully. "But not with money."

She gave him a _How?_ look, and as her mind worked she gave him a disgusted _You Pervert_! face that James hadn't seen in a long time.

"Not like that. Look, Lily, don't worry about it. You look more worried then most do when dementors come by," he said, smiling slightly. Then he sighed angrily. "All this bloody baggage."

Lily smiled and took the baggage from one hand, transferred it to her other, and grasped his hand. He didn't protest.

They walked on, and stopped at the Quality Quidditch Supplies store. James looked in at the brooms, and sighed in admiration. The new Nimbus lines were out. The Nimbus Five Hundred right next to the other sport's brooms with titles like Draconious, the Mercury Fives, and the Shooting Stars (the last a dying breed of brooms).

They passed on, and finally they came to the alley James was looking for. The one alley where no one came because there was nothing but rubbish in it.

"Have you made up your mind?" he asked as Lily looked the

_Made up my mind on what? _

"On where you want to eat your picnic?"

She frowned, and then shrugged.

"Then," he smiled, "We'll have to eat it all over the world."

Sandwiches on the Eiffel Tower (which was still cold), crisps (A/N: for those non Brits crisps are "chips") on the China Wall, lemonade on the sphinx, salad on top of the White House (where they almost got caught by men in muggle black suits), and sweets touring the Taj Mahal.

"Next time we'll see Rome and all of that. I wanted to conquer some continents first," he smiled at her.

She grinned, looking around her at the Aztec jungle they were in, finishing off her lemonade bottle with a swig. They were camped on a moss covered pyramid, and leaning on one another's shoulders.

"I was going to take you to Antartica, but I thought better of it. I don't really like the cold, and I hope you're not too disappointed at not seeing the penguins, but-."

A scream rippled from the jungle, and Lily jumped, clinging to James.

A few men stepped out of the forest about, clad in different animal skins, and hefting spears.

"Right, time to get going," James said, and with a wave to them, and a smile, he stood, clutching Lily, and spun.

Little did they know that they would be forever immortalized in a statue with their plastic lemonade bottles on a shrine.


	18. Our Guys

A/N: The date isn't over quite yet, and I know it was a tad presumptuous of me to have the date all over the world using apparition, but I didn't think floo networks would be all that romantic, and then a broom ride, which would have suited James fine, would have taken too long. But I hope you had a bit of a laugh at the idea.

But thank you for the reviews (especially the recent ones!). Criticism is required for perfection, which I'm trying to achieve. LoL!

P.S. sorry about the weird writing style, I've been reading Little Women.

James and Lily laughed as they entered the Three Broomsticks, holding hands, with them no longer laden with goods and sat down in a corner, as far from the crowds as they could get, even if a meter wasn't exactly what they had in mind.

It had begun to rain again in the UK, not a good sign for the Quidditch match next weekend, but luckily it was forecasted to be clear. But no one ever knows with the weather men of the century, James was proclaiming.

"You'd think they'd have some aspect of what's coming next with all that muggle radar plus our magic, and yet we're still, oooh, hullo, Rosmerta," he said, giving the under year a somewhat forced cordial smile. Lily frowned. Young for James, but the girl was showing healthy signs of being extremely good looking later on. Then she sighed, smiling to herself. She trusted James, and in his non-fickality towards her… non-fickality? Was that even a word? To not be fickle? Nah, _non-fickality _sounded better.

She laughed at herself. She and her friends had made up words all the time, had even wrote them down in the Gryffindor Girl Dictionary. Words like _Beautimous_, or _Gorgimous_, or _Discombobulated_ (A/N: which actually is a word). She remembered the time that James had stolen it because he thought it was a diary, but was disappointed. However he turned it into his glee as he started spouting the words they made up. It had ended in the shredding of the book, and James at the bad end of a _levi corpus_ charm. She couldn't quite remember if he'd had to go to the Hospital Wing for that one when James interrupted her thoughts.

"Lily? You alright?"

She nodded, and then slipped out a notebook and a pencil.

"What by Merlin is this?" he asked, stealing the pencil out of her hand right before she placed it to the notebook of muggle paper and holding it with a pointer finger at each end. She snatched it back with a face, and made a one moment motion with her finger as she began to write.

"So it's like some quill?" James said, peering over her shoulder at the writing.

She nodded, but didn't look up.

Without the alluring green eyes looking at him he grew impatient, wanting them to turn back to him, so James, bored, took off his and Lily's cloak, placing them on the back of their chairs. That was, until she shoved the paper at him. "What is this stuff? Parchment, but flimsier, ok, ok, I'm reading," he said, smirking a bit as Lily jabbed the end of the pencil at the paper.

_Do you hate me for all of those times I've hexed you_?

Her perfectly curved handwriting startled him. He looked up and met those imploring eyes. And he began to smile.

"Please explain to me, Lily Evans, why I would be going on a date with you if I so in fact hated you?" he said, still smiling. It was obviously as infecting as usual, because she tried to suppress her own smile as she shrugged, a blush creeping over her freckled face. "Though I must compliment your ability in hexing, because with me as your dummy you've improved immensely in your last three years." Lily made a guilty face and ducked her head, "But," he continued, "I'm hoping that will never happen again, and if you should ever need a dummy I'll get Snape for you."

He remembered vividly his "dislike" for Snape… that was when James was jealous of him. Snape was able to have a decent conversation with Lily three times a day, and yet James would never have gotten a moment like that. He got a rude remark or a hex while Snape- the ugly greasy ball- got a smile more often than not. Luckily that had changed when Snape had completely blown it- well, he had it coming, being a death eater and all. That's when James had advice from a certain werewolf that Lily didn't much take kindly to violence of any nature. Then James had proudly sported his "I haven't done harm to Snape in three months, or wait was that two and a half?" metaphorical badge around Lily during that time too, and that still hadn't won her over.

What did that matter at the moment? He was on a date with _**her**_- his perfect girl.

Now James met a similar distasteful look from the past Lily that hadn't given him a second ago. He groaned internally. He'd mentioned Snape. He'd forgot that Lily still has unhappy feelings with the incident two years ago.

"I was only kidding," he soothed, but Rosmerta then thankfully chose the right time to bring their drinks. Lily smiled at Rosmerta, who waved them good bye. James winced when he heard her mumbling loudly about sirens. The girl was mad about him.

Lily shrugged, and smiled a bit.

_I know, I just don't like it… _

"I won't do it anymore. It's just…"

_Kind of natural?_ She looked partially sarcastic, and James wanted to keep that away as much as possible.  
"No, no, I changed all that. I just can't help not liking him. You know it is your fault for me not liking him. I wouldn't have cared half as much about him being a death eater if you hadn't paid so much attention to him," he explained, popping the top of a butter beer and took a sip with his eyes glued to her the whole time.

_Me_?

"Yeah you, so you shouldn't be so harsh on me."

_Actually I should_.

"Why?"

_Because_, her face alluded, and then she pointed to him and then herself, and shook her head.

"Because I shouldn't like you?" he said, with his eye brows raised. He got an affirmative nod, and then he started to laugh. She tried to understand what was so funny, but couldn't. "Lily Evans, even if I shouldn't like you, I have to."

Have to?

"Yes, I do," he said with a smile, but his eyes were very serious. "Because you're you." Her questioning gaze was answered by a remarkable smile. "You'll find out." His eyes wandered from her and landed on someone or something behind her.

"Hey, mate! Or should I say mates," Sirius said, looking to Lily to blush, which so obliged him in.

James threw him a look and Sirius bowed his head in penitence.

The crowd crowded around their table, and each had drinks from Rosmerta herself, and each person broke out into conversation.

Lily grinned excitedly at Alice who was holding Frank's (who was as delighted as his pair) arm. She smiled back, either too elated, or too absorbed or both in Frank that she couldn't say anymore.

Mary looked completely put out, sitting next to Peter, who was trying to get up the courage to talk to her. Apparently her other date had left her or something. Or that Alice wasn't talking to her. Sirius, however, when he talked to her, would keep her lively for a while. Lily felt partially bad for her, but smiled at her. She smiled exasperatedly back, and looked back to Sirius, who winked at her. Remus was separated from Sirius by a girl Lily had never seen before, and Remus seemed quite interested in her.

She was brunette, and Lily was sure she'd never seen her before… yet she was wearing Gryffindor colors and she sure looked like a seventh year.

Lily nudged James who was laughing animatedly with Sirius and Mary, and he looked at her immediately, with a _What?_ expression. She pointed at the girl, who giggled at Remus.

"Oh, her," he smiled at the couple. "You two are getting along quite nicely," James commented loudly. Even though they weren't addressed Alice and Frank blushed.

Remus flushed, to Lily's great surprise.

"You all don't provide the intellectual conversation I require, and just because I talk to a girl does _not_ mean, to the contrary of your minds, that I want anything more than conversation."

But to Lily's surprise the girl's hair turned bright pink.

Tonks? Of course. The first year metamorphmagus that was somehow related to Sirius. The teachers and students had marked her for trouble on the first day when she had somehow knocked over an entire row of highly polished suits of armor.

"Nymphadora, is that a _love_-ly color in your hair," smiled Sirius, tugging on her hair, which turned a violent shade of red. Sirius dropped the lock as though it had singed him.

"Don't call me Nymphadora, Sirius," said Tonks quite calmly.

Lily would've ducked for cover at the look in those eyes.

"Red means dead, Padfoot," sang James, and he laughed when Tonks laughed. The tense moment broke and they all had a good laugh. James swung his arm around Lily and hugged her.

"We should do this again," said Tonks, smiling at Lily, "Our guys are so weird sometimes, aren't they?"

She nodded with a grin. _Our guys_… It sounded nice.

"I don't know, it might be hard to get these two out of their bubble," said Sirius, nudging James, and he laughed.

"It's true," smiled James, kissing her forehead.

Lily blushed.

_Our guys… my guy… _


	19. Prince Charming and Story Book Story

A/N: Thanks for 150 reviews! You lot are miracles, and thanks for making my day. So… I'll give you a reward. Also, if you don't know Beauty and the Beast, review and I'll contact you.

He was amazing (no question on who he is because he is him and that was the end of it). That's all you could say. Lily'd known it from the beginning of course, but not in such depth. He was more romantic than she could've dreamed, more intelligent than she'd given him credit for, more understanding than if she'd been an open book, charming, witty, handsome, caring, loyal, loving… What else was there? Everything you could look for in a story book Prince Charming. Right? Well, there is always a flaw or two in Prince Charming. The one that was bugging her the most right now was the fact that he had another love. Of course, in fairy tales its sword play or horse back riding. For her James? Quidditch.

She didn't mind the sport. It was fun to watch, and she went to every match even though Mary felt like skiving sometimes or Alice had homework. She'd even met the team the Harpies, and in fact knew one of the players from when she was a first year (Slughorn had introduced her to the player Hooch at one of his infrequent parties.)

But she minded how much time it took to practice.

She had tried watching, but practice was less entrancing than the sport, and she fell asleep in the stands. Twice. James had put an end to that by keeping her prisoner with a disgruntled Sirius, a cheerful Remus, and a timid Peter who apparently needed "Remedial Charms".

Then it took so long (well, especially this week because the match was coming up). And he was so tired after that she could barely keep him awake during patrol. She understood of course. She had things she liked to do that he didn't like. Homework, reading muggle fairy tales with happy endings and … well, other things…

And it was funny how she now based her day around James.

But this Quidditch thing was unbearable sometimes. Like right now. Without homework her mind wasn't easily side tracked. Not even the Beauty and the Beast could deter her mind. Maybe it was because she knew it by heart and that she was relating the fairy tale to her and James story. Of course in their lives there were no jealous sisters, no Gaston like in Disney's version. Only the romance and the little ghosts that helped them along the way.

But Friday now, that's when she heard him.

The curfew bell had rung twenty minutes ago, and the portrait hole opened, and the team came dashing in.

What James called their every day "warm down" was running to the Tower quick enough so that they wouldn't get caught.

"Hit the sack and save your partying for tomorrow, got it?" said James, panting to the team, "With the way you've all been working we'll win for sure." He congratulated each of the members jubilantly and positively, and made sure they went up the staircases.

Lily was looking hopefully over the back of her armchair, smiling happily at him when he saw her. He looked joyously back, and walked wearily over to her.

"Ready for duty," he said with a small half smile, holding his hand out at her.

She took it, and pulled herself up after him. He was still in his Quidditch uniform, and it was muddy, and he smelled a bit weird, but again, Prince Charming has flaws. And they were just fine with her (in all honesty).

She pocketed her wand, and they left out the door, holding hands.

Now of course they'd been going out for about two weeks now, and this had caused speculations about exactly what they did on their "head duty" business. James, surprisingly, had put that to a stop the moment someone mentioned anything about Lily immorally, with amazing (and rather attractive) vigor. The fourth year had almost been in serious danger of going to St. Mungo's.

She yawned unexpectedly, and had been unconsciously leaning on James.

"Maybe I'll do duty tonight," he smiled at her as they walked down a corridor, his wand lit.

She shook her head, and straightened up purposefully.

James laughed.

They trooped along, Lily blinking away sleep. This was silly. She'd been waiting to see him since six. What by Godric was wrong with her?

"You, Lily, need sleep. You shouldn't wait up for this, or for me. And you haven't been taking your regular naps before we do duty since we started dating," he pointed out. Both of them smiled faintly at the end of his sentence, but Lily shrugged it off.

He rolled his eyes. "You're going to be sick and I'll be just as worried when you've got some sort of cold that is incurable."

She laughed. _The common cold_. The forever daunting sickness that even Muggles couldn't cure because it was always morphing into different bacteria.

"It's not funny. If you get sick I'll have to miss all my classes to try to get in to see Madam Pomfrey, or worse, you won't be sick enough to see Madam Pomfrey and you'll have to go lay in bed, and I won't be able to get up to see you," James rambled, waving his wand exuberantly. But she could tell that he didn't want her to go, because he didn't take her back to the Common Room.

"What are you holding?" he asked, looking at the picture book in her hand. He grew more interested when she blushed. "What is it? A diary?"

She shook her head.

"What is it then?"

He pocketed his wand with the tip hanging out so that there was still light, and Lily opposed him, if only for a moment before he snatched it.

"Another muggle book?" he smiled, and let go of Lily's hand to look through it, skimming across the pages. "Who's that?" and "How strang- I mean different-," he would mumble. Lily held her arms awkwardly.

"I like this bloke here, the one kissing the girl," he grinned, stopping to sit on the pedestal of a statue on the fifth floor.

Lily smiled, and then sat by him, pointing to him, and then flipping back to pages of the Beast and pointing to him, and then pointing back to the "bloke kissing the girl".

"They're the same?"

She nodded. She really loved how he could understand her right away.

He grinned, and pointed to a few tattered pages and stains on the paper. "You really like this one, don't you?"

She nodded, biting her lip.

"Well then I'll have to read it."

She rolled her eyes, blushing a bit.

"Right now's good," he said, enjoying her shock and look of disbelief, "A bed time story would do you good."

And he did read it. Lily blushed and smiled and was somber at all the right parts, and James loved having an audience as good as Lily. He put it in a different light, and made different voices for everyone. She laughed outright when he tried the deep voice of the Beast, but he kept it up faithfully.

"…and they lived happily ever after."

She was very sleepy, smiling serenely.

James laughed, closing the book. "Falling asleep while I read? How rude," he said in a falsely stern tone. She was suddenly aware of how close those hazel eyes were.

"I'll teach you to stay awake while I read," he said, smiling alluringly.

Suddenly his lips touched hers, and the thrill of excitement woke her up. She was completely and totally powerless as James deepened the kiss, and Lily closed her eyes.

All in a moment, he stopped. She almost fell over as he stood up abruptly, looking fixedly in the other direction.

_Oh no,_ she thought, _I must be the worst kisser ever_. But it was partially his fault. He'd never let anyone else kiss her. But he interrupted her thoughts.

"Sorry, Lily, it wasn't you're fault," said James, smiling down at her, and picking up the book. She looked at him despairingly. "And you're not a bad kisser. In fact you're too good of a kisser," he smiled, and gave her a hand up. "I like the story."

She nodded as he looped an arm around her.

They walked around tiredly for a while.

James was deliberately quiet. Lily could feel it. She didn't like it either. She wondered what was troubling him. She looked up at him purposefully, but he looked straight ahead, firmly.

"I'm afraid I'll kiss you again," he said abruptly. She blinked up at him and concluded that she must be a bad kisser, because if a guy didn't want to kiss her… well, it wasn't good. "And you're not a bad kisser, so stop fretting."

It was so weird when he did that.

"Just… have you ever thought about happily ever after, Lily?"

Lily looked imploringly up at him, startled by his expression.

"There you two are," McGonagall's stern voice made them jump apart as though she'd smacked a bludger their way. "You both better not be up to shenanigans. Just because you're allowed out doesn't mean that you're not supposed to take care of your duty first."

Lily hid her guilty smile well, and James slid his hand back into hers.

"Of course not, Professor. We only read a bit," James said, smiling undauntedly at McGonagall.

The elder woman's smile was only a flicker, but Lily knew it had been there a moment ago.


	20. A Sirius Problem

The match went well… no, actually, in James' mind, it went excellently. The whole match was ideal from the weather to the final snatch for the snitch. Except that bludger hitting him off his broom. It was kind of his fault. He had been waving to Lily and the bloody Slytherin had snuck up on him with the bludger. Thankfully Kingsley had it under control before it came back for James. And he was thankful for those pull up exercises he'd drilled the team on. At least he was able to pull himself up on his own broom.

After the match though, (which was two hundred and sixty to eighty) the bludger incident was a good thing. It made Lily fawn over him, which was always a good thing. The problem was Lily wanted too many kisses.

Now James Potter was an excellent kisser. Sirius was his only rival in the whole of Gryffindor as people would say, but that wasn't the problem. Lily was a good kisser too, for a beginner. But that wasn't the problem either.

The problem was what the kisses meant to him. They kept him hoping… And hoping wasn't good for him. He would imagine kids, a home, and a marriage all in one fail swoop. Lily? Lily probably didn't read anything into those same kisses. This was all a school kid crush for her.

He'd loved her almost one third of his life now, and he saw nothing after her because that was the way he'd always planned it. He wanted her to feel that way too, eventually of course, but so soon? It might damage their relationship.

So he would stop them, before they got too serious. A kiss meant commitment, and what happened during kisses and that sort of thing was the most commitment James imagined ever. He wanted her to feel the same commitment first before anything serious happened.

And speaking of the dog, Sirius Black was acting as dark as his sir name and James had no idea why. Peter didn't know, and Remus… well Remus wasn't a load of help seeing as Remus and Sirius were always together now… James didn't mind that either. James and Lily were always together, and they would hang out with the other Marauders almost every spare moment they had.

So the match was excellent. But the after match party?

Lily and the Marauders were celebrating in the Common Room with the others, talking about the match, and everything about it from the Slytherin's murderous looks after the match to the way the hoops looked when the quaffle went through them.

Sirius was almost saying as much as Lily, but he was far less cheery with the butter beer in his hand and as murderous look as the loosing Slytherins. He looked at Lily a lot, and Remus looked at him.

"What's the matter mate? You look at cheerful as a dementor," James joked, looking imploringly over at his friend.

"Nothing," lied Sirius.

"I hope you weren't betting against me. You know I always win," James laughed, high from the excitement of the match still, and holding Lily's hand with pride.

"I wasn't," he said and took another swig of butter beer.

"Then what's up?"

"Nothing."

Now James was worried.

"Why're you worried 'bout me? You w-won and you've go' 'ur girl, so leave me 'lone," Sirius mumbled, taking another swish of his drink. He sounded drunk.

"What?" James said, trying to smile through his confusion.

"James, maybe later," Remus said, trying to shield James from Sirius.

Tonks looked up from talking to Lily when she realized her companion's attention was no longer hers.

"No, if he wan's to 'ear it now, tha' he'd better 'ear it," Sirius said, clumsily pushing Remus aside. "Tha' gurl 'as go' you whipped, Prongs. That dumb redhead's always here. Let's just go back to the way things were."

"The way things were?" James said, confused. "They're the same. I think you've had a bit too much to drink. What were you drinking anyways?"

"Wha's it ma'er? You wouldn'ta noticed anyways if I weren' here," he said, looking at James. "If I'd have left, you would've stayed here with her."

"Yeah, probably. So what? You want me to follow you around?" James told him, impatience in his voice.

"No, I only want your-," he hiccuped mid sentence, before growling out, "friendship, but I lost it to her," said Sirius, jabbing at Lily. Anger was rising in his voice as he stood.

"You're my best mate, and always will be," said James easily, "Who'd you think's gonna be my best man, man?" he added, attempting to make his friend smile.

"So why not just shag her and be done with it!?"

James was on his feet, with a look that could've rivaled the one he often gave Snape.

"Look James, he's drunk, he doesn't mean it," Remus said, moving between them.

"Yeah I bloody well do mean it, Remus, and we don't need you butting in!"

Remus stood determinedly like a wall between them, pushing Sirius back, staring at James. "Just let lie. He doesn't think you care about anything anymore, but he'll adjust. He's had you for his best mate for ages, and now there is someone with, well, more priority is what I'd guess you'd say, than him."

"More priority?" James said, his jaw still rigid with anger. "You think that's what it's about? So what, Padfoot, you want to marry me instead?"

"You- calling me a fairy?"

"Yeah, maybe I am. Just because I've got Lily doesn't mean you're not my brother!"

"The bloody hell it's not! You coo over her twenty four seven. You and I both know that you just wanna shag her! So get it done with and dump her!"

"I'm not like you- I don't go after everything female around the place, or wait, maybe everything male too," James said. He didn't mean it, but anger makes everything true. Sirius punched James in the face, cracking his glasses

James toppled onto the floor, and Remus held Sirius back.

"You sodding son of a -!"

Sirius hit Remus aside, and came after James.

But he met Lily half way there. Her green eyes were ablaze, her mouth set and her expression looking more deadly than her wand, and Sirius Black had never felt more ashamed in his life.


	21. Swallowing the Knife

Lily's head was in her arms as she crumpled in a ball. She felt miserable. Absolutely miserable. She wished she hadn't done what she did. Now James wouldn't talk to her, and Lily couldn't defend herself with her words.

"_Get out of my way," Sirius growled in her memory. His blue eyes were so daunting and full of fury that she almost felt pity. Almost. He'd hurt James for some dumb selfish reason and Lily wasn't about to let Black take it all out on James. _

_Lily just shook her head at him. _No

_"You think you can take my place as his best mate?" he roared, his putrid breathe spitting saliva at her. He was drunk for sure now. Lily only glared back, however, letting her eyes talk for her. "You think that's what you're going to do?" he continued, his eyes now so angry they looked as black as his name. "You buggering-!"_

_He made a clumsy jolt at her, and she hexed him at the same time James did behind her. _

_The whole Common Room was silent as Sirius hung upside down in a full body bind, glowering at James and Lily, before he passed out._

She'd made James commit base treachery against his best mate.

Now, Sirius was in the Hospital wing with some after effect of the curses mingled with the Fire Whisky that he'd masked as Butter Beer creating a greater problem, and James was with him, silently waiting until his best friend woke up. James hadn't spoken to her in the least since the problem. It was as if she was invisible, and she couldn't talk to him, or even shout at him. Sirius had deserved it, even if he was James' best friend.

_The prat!_

_The dumb, horrible prat, making James feel terrible_.

Was she any better? Was she? She was the one that had kept James all to herself, selfish and prideful as usual. She had been awful to both James and Sirius. Everybody was in the Hospital Wing, and she wouldn't even go, because she was so arrogant and pig headed and a toe rag.

_Because Black was in the wrong_, she rationalized.

_But so was I, stealing his best mate and everything_.

_But he tried to make James choose_.

_You were the one that made James choose you over his friend_.

_But I didn't know_.

_No excuse_.

The battle continued in her head.

And James… She moaned internally at the thought of him. James had looked terrible, almost worse than she felt. His face had been dead, as though all the expression had been sucked up inside him. She knew the face. The brooding face that happened when he lost a Quidditch match, or when she'd been particularly cruel to him… except it was worse. She had made him feel this way, she was sure of it and he wouldn't even look at her so she could say sorry.

She wanted her voice back. She wanted it now. She wanted it so bad so she could at least hear herself cry. So she wasn't alone in the deafening silence of her empty bedroom. The echoes would have kept her company, kept her sane. Or would they have?

She had to say sorry somehow.

But how?

This awful misery was too much to bear. With James angry with her… and her being so inexcusably dreadful to Sirius…

She would just have to say sorry plain and simple.

And it would take a lot with her red headed pride, but she had to. She felt like her whole being was going to disappear without James at her side. He was her interpreter, her friend and companion, her entertainer, her happiness, her journal, her caretaker, her… everything. She understood completely how Sirius must have felt loosing a brother like James to someone like her, someone so unworthy of him.

So she'd have to swallow her pride and be somewhat worthy.

It took all her humility to make her to the portrait hole. She just stood their. The empty room was littered with party mess, and even as she stood a streamer fell gently on her head.

Then it took all her misery to walk to the Hospital Wing, determinedly placing one foot in front of the other, wanting forgiveness from Sirius, and more importantly, James.

In front of the Hospital Wing, Lily wiped her eyes. She had been about to open the door, but had decided against it. _The prat_. Sirius deserved to be in this mess… making James choose.

But James was more important than that. She knew that she was as bad as Sirius right now. She was about to swallow the knife when a yell broke the trance.

"…Don't you get it, Remus? It's all my fault, for being so awful! What if I did this to you?"

Lily jumped at the frustration in James' voice.

"You did."

Silence responded, except maybe a tiny moan.

"But you and Sirius have a closer bond than I do. He always saw it as Lily this and Lily that. I don't think he thought you were serious about her in the least. He was just used to being glued to you twenty four seven, and Lily was something he didn't foresee. So don't blame yourself James. It's perfectly natural when a person's in love. Just balance us out, or let's all be together always. Then its fair for everyone," said Remus quietly, and comforted him.

"You're my family, everybody that I care about. I hate having to choose between brothers and... Well, I don't want anyone to get hurt," he ended even more quietly than Remus so Lily had to press her ear to the door.

"You're not hurting anyone this way. Just talk with us more. I think that will help. You're just always talking with Lily-."

"You know why? It's because she can't talk. She has no one else to communicate with. Not even her friends understand her like I do. I love her too much to let her be alone and think she's worthless when she's not and that's why I'm always with her…"

But Lily didn't hear the last sentence. There was a roaring in her ears. So it was a charity job. She was just so in need of someone to talk to like the girl she was and James had felt guilty. She'd lapped him up as though he was the elixir of life, and now, imagining that she was indeed in love with him…

How was she going to say sorry now?

But something woke her.

"You finally admit that you love her," Remus chuckled.

"What else would it be?"

"A need to be satisfied?"

Sirius' voice was hoarse, and she could practically feel Sirius' brothers' delight that elevated the feeling of the room. Their quiet laughter almost lifted Lily's heavy heart.

"You ok, mate?" James asked.

"Maybe… look, I'm sorry. Can you tell that to her? I didn't mean to. Just, just tell her I'm sorry."

Lily's heart stopped, and she peeked through the crevice of the double door-ed entrance at the scene nearby. James and Sirius were clasping hands as Remus looked on.

"'Course you did," James said, trying to be up beat. His back was turned to Lily, so she couldn't see her expression. "You meant every word, but I was the one you should've yelled at. She had nothing to do with it."

"I did yell at you, as I recall," Sirius tried at a joke.

"Yeah, you did," laughed James shakily, "And you hit me too. Where'd you learn to hit like that?"

"My dad," mumbled Sirius. The room's atmosphere went dark.

"Look, I'll tell her," James said, breaking the silence. "But I think she'd rather hear you say it."

It took all of Lily's devotion to walk into the room. But she couldn't walk anymore. Her shoes on the stone were enough to awaken everyone to her prescience, and she felt like crumbling on the spot.

James looked around first, and Sirius peered over his shoulder before his eyes went wide. Remus only seemed to smile, and she knew that he knew how long she'd been listening.

"Hey, Padfoot, I think she heard," Remus smiled.

Lily nodded stiffly.

"And she's sorry too," James told Sirius, not quite meeting her eyes.

"Look, you bloody bastard, go to your girl and stop fretting over my sick bed like some old lady or some 'at," Sirius said with a half smile at James and then looked at Lily. "Truce?"

She shook her head.

James, who was half way toward her, and the rest of the room, stopped.

She bit her lip, and didn't know how to explain how she felt without a piece of paper. She looked at James imploringly, and made her way over to him, before forcing him backwards to sit on Sirius' bed. She motioned to the two of them, and then to Remus (Peter was asleep on the bed next to them in a half drunken stooper apparently).

She placed their hands with on each others, and then stepped back.

"What the-?" Sirius said, completely confused.

"Lily Evans, if you don't put your hand on mine right now you can forget the whole thing," James said, glaring at her.

Lily shook her head and motioned to all three of them.

"What is going on?" Remus asked.

"She says she wants us to be friends, and she will step away from it all so we won't fight anymore," James said angrily, and made a snag for her, but missed

"You know, Evans, I never liked martyrs or whatever they're bloody called," Sirius said, and with amazing speed for someone with a hang over, grabbed her elbow and forced her forward to join the group. "So do we say "all for one and one for all" now?"

They laughed, and the truce was made.


	22. Angels and Demons

A/N: Hi again! I'm shooting for two hundred soon, and we haven't even gone off the deep end yet. LoL. By the way this isn't copyrighted. I really was just getting a test to see how the non verbal thing would work out with the populous. I'm an author to be, you see, so look for the title Mute sooner or later in life if you like my stuff! Now I'm done rambling. (Oh, and if you're offended by my half cursing, tell me, k?)

Severus eyed the Gryffindor with both envy and grief.

He had known it, known it from the beginning. She had fallen for that "toe rag". Lily Evans was going to end up Lily Potter.

And his dream that had gone on since before Hogwarts of Lily Snape would be completely thrashed.

He watched as she smiled at Potter, he fingered her hair and talked to her, holding hands while they ate, and Potter would feed her off his fork even though Lily apparently didn't want it. They would laugh at that stupid Black and Lupin and Black's niece, T-something and Pettigrew, the little rat.

Even though her voice was gone he read her expressions like a book.

She was happy with him, so happy that it hurt him physically, like his insides were collapsing on one another. He grimaced and looked away. His plate was full of food. He'd barely eaten lately. He wasn't hungry. Well, for food at least.

Severus couldn't stand it. He looked back up at Lily, and he kept looking. She was so full of light, of good, and here he was stuck in dark, and in evil, and loathing every moment of it. Like a demon looking up at an angel in heaven among the cloud. A beautiful angel that had no business dating a dull human like James Potter.

"Severus," said someone. He waved them off.

"Hey, Prince," someone grabbed the back of his robes, "Stop gazing at the mudblood and look here. We need the essays."

"Get off," Snape snarled, both angry at the way they treated him, and at being caught looking at Lily again, and for Avery calling Lily a mudblood. He hated that word more than anything. He shrugged the hands away, his hand dropping to his pocket.

The person let go. The hand had felt like Mulciber. "Severus, the Dark Lord wants us to pass our classes, and we need your help."

_Or you're just lazy and think you're better because you're pureblood_. But he had done the homework for them, as usual. The common threats were just an excuse to show dominance over a person. Anyways, they had promised to put in a good word with Malfoy, not that Severus didn't converse with Malfoy always.

He dazed into space.

Lily's eyes smiled at him. _"Hey Sev!" "What're you doing, Sev?" "Love you, Sev!" _

Smiling like a fool, he stood and walked out.

If only Lily had been a Slytherin. If only he had been a Gryffindor. If only he was good looking, and a good Quidditch player, and out going. They would've been. They could've been, if not for Potter.

Potter made his blood run hot with anger and loathing and cold with revenge and hatred. Stolen Lily. He'd stolen Lily somehow, taken advantage because now she couldn't snap at him with her voice. If only James Potter hadn't existed. _Or if he stopped existing. _

He had plotted Potter's demise in many ways.

However, all of them included Lily loving him more than Potter, and that wasn't working at the moment. And the angel probably wouldn't like the demon if he hadn't changed. Now he would have to kill Potter quietly, or have Avery and Mulciber do it somehow, so that Lily, devastated, would be welcoming to a good shelter that Snape could provide. That's how the plan would have to work… but the demon couldn't exactly stage it just yet… or he might not, because he didn't have enough spine to do it.

If only he hadn't been so mad at Potter he would've never said anything of the sort to Lily. She was as pure as they came, more pure than Avery and Mulciber and Malfoy. No mudblood could be as pure as Lily.

Angels were pure. Demons were not. But if a demon was repentant? If a demon wanted love and light too? The angel would have to understand. He would make her understand somehow, someday.

He had planned to show how good he could be. When they were married, with kids, he would never argue with her, or beat the children. He would be a good husband, someone worthy of the angel that she was.

He was in Potions before he knew it. To his surprise no one but Pettigrew was in the room. Where was Slughorn? Severus knew that Peter had remedial potions. It was common knowledge. But normally Slughorn didn't let Peter by himself. Catastrophes normally occurred with Pettigrew in the room.

Pettigrew jumped as he entered.

"Don't wet yourself," gruffed Severus.

Before Severus knew it he was flat on the floor, surprised by the poorly preformed _reducto_ curse. "What the-?"

"Don't! I don't want it from you too! You're all alike, everyone!"

Snape looked confused at the angry boy. He was red in the face, his crooked mousy teeth bared in a ferocious grimace.

"What do you mean?" Snape ventured, pushing himself on his elbows and then his hands, sitting up to finger the wand in his pocket.

"You, Potter, Black, everyone, always beating on me. Just because I'm short, or- or," the short lived loathing seemed to dwindle.

"Potter? Black? I thought you were friends," Severus said, standing now with his hand in his pocket. He was quick on the draw. He wouldn't fear now. But his cunning mind was racing. The Marauders had been a band since ever. They'd been so tight knit no one could get into their heads. Some rumors were that they could read each others' minds. But now, now a weak link in their chain?

"I don't know. Ever since seventh year started… it's been, different," Peter deflated onto a stool, looking timid. "Evans dating James has really kept me out of the group. Remus tries but Sirius needs him… well, needed him. Now I'm a nobody."

_You always were a nobody_. The three magnificent Gryffindor boys, James Potter, the golden boy that could do no wrong even when he was doing wrong, Sirius Black, the dark one, good looks performing for him every moment of the day to make him an idol, and Remus Lupin, mysterious to the maximum, sharp as his fangs (Severus thought to himself), and then their was that fourth one… what's his name? It started with a P…

"And then now the younger years pick on me, and it's so humiliating…" Peter droned. "I just am a nobody now…"

"A nobody?" Severus smiled, "I was one once too, you know."

Pettigrew looked up, interested.

"Because of the Dark Lord, I am important. I am better than everything," smiled Severus. The same lie that he'd been told, except without the twist that Lily would love him more because he was a Death Eater. It had been just the opposite. "You could be too, if you wanted. The Dark Lord will give you powers to overcome everything. He'll give you power to rule with him when he conquers the world."

From the moment he said those words, he knew what Pettigrew was thinking.

Hook, line and sinker. Pettigrew was caught in the net of the demons.

"So you'll tell You-Know-Who about me if I do this for you?"

"Certainly… just sabotage… that's all you need to do," Severus smiled.

Another demon… but one that wouldn't miss heaven like the one that had caught him in the net of lies.


	23. Peter's Predicament

"What do you mean, 'have to go out'? I'm not letting you use my cloak for no good reason, Peter," James said unhappily. For the last quarter of an hour the two had been bickering about the invisibility cloak.

"Well, I n-need to use it. I don't want to get caught by Filch," said Peter, timidly.

"Pro'ly just wants to stuff his face," Sirius yawned as he assembled himself on the bed. "You know, Peter, you don't need the cloak to do that. Just look at the stash under your bed for example." With a wave of his wand a chocolate frog zoomed into Sirius' hand. "Thanks," he said, taking a bite before the frog could jump properly.

Remus chuckled as he analyzed his book for his essay for Defense Against the Dark Arts. Being from the restricted section, it often burst out in steam with a wail worthy of the pitch of a heated tea pot. Remus slammed it shut again, and opened it back up when it quieted. "Bloody book."

"What?" Sirius said, sitting up right.

"What?" Remus said, surprised by his friend's astonishment. He looked around him to see where the attraction for his friend's commotion was. "What?"

"Did you- you Remus Lupin- just say "bloody book"?"

Remus, still confused at the wide eyed Sirius Black, nodded.

Both Sirius and James burst out laughing.

"What?" Peter demanded as Remus joined in.

"Are you really that thick, Wormtail?" Black said, still smiling. "Remus- _the_ Remus Lupin- just _cursed_ a book, even though-."

"-his passion is imbedded in books," James finished, grinning.

"Well it keeps blowing up-," Remus tried.

"But you're so much more in love with books than any other girl," James smiled.

"No I'm-," Remus said, laughingly indignant.

Sirius caught on to James direction, "Well, you keep more books in bed then women," Sirius said, chucking his trash at the can, and missed- again. His previous mishaps lay all over the floor.

Remus rolled his eyes, "Just because I don't make out with every girl that attracts my fancy-," Remus told them.

"There's a girl that's caught your fancy?" James asked, smiling mischievously.

"Well-," Remus said.

"Oh Merlin, if you say my cousin I'll have to kill you," Sirius groaned falsely, lying back on his bed with a dramatic flourish when he covered his eyes with a pillow. But he peeked out to see Remus' reaction.

"In love with a first year? You've got to be drunk, Padfoot," Remus said, the thought almost absurd to him. She was eleven for Godric's sword!

"Alrigh' then, mate, who're you in love with?" they pressed.

"Do I have to be in love with anyone?" Remus said unhappily. What if he didn't want to be in love? The no secrets rule would be particularly hard for anything of the sort to happen to him, much less the danger of the possibility of being in close proximity with another being besides animals (or animagus).

"Hey!" everyone looked at Peter, and quietly Remus was thankful for the divert in attention. He didn't need to be pestered about something that would never exist for him, nor could he ever allow it to exist. "James, I need to go now, or I'll be la-," but he stopped himself.

"Look," James sighed as Peter scowled at him.

"What? Am I not your friend enough to have the cloak? You'd let Sirius have it, and Remus," Peter demanded, and he walked out in a huff.

Remus looked after Peter, frowning. That was not like his friend.

Frank, who was coming in, asked, "What's amiss?"

James shrugged as he headed toward the bathroom. Remus and Sirius could tell he was feeling guilty, both about upsetting Peter, and about not giving Peter the cloak.

"Pete's just gone down the stairs in a state," Frank informed them as he set his bag on the bed. "Wonder what's wrong with the poor bloke? Girl trouble?"

"I dunno, but I doubt he's got a girl," Black said, sighing as though he was bored of the subject, "Peter's just craving to eat something I guess," he shrugged, not letting everyone know that he was slightly worried about the incident. Remus read through the mask like a book. Remus was worried about it too. Peter never normally didn't do that sort of thing. He refrained from chewing on his lip, and he decided to change the subject.

"So, Frank, how was your date with Alice?"

"Absolutely wonderful. She's a spectacular girl, my Alice…"

"Lily's better!" James called from the other room, to the chuckles of all.

"I doubt that. Oh yeah, that reminds me, Lily wanted James to have this," Frank said, holding the parchment in the air in direction of the bathroom. "She said it was something important that you had to read immediately... yeah, that's what she said."

James' head popped out of the lavatory, eyes wide in a smile, and tooth brush still in his mouth. Sirius laughed as tooth paste dribbled onto his pajamas. James rolled his eyes and spit out the tooth paste before fumbling for his glasses.

"Wonder what this is about," James said, and everyone heard the peculiar note in his voice. Sirius rolled his eyes with a smirk.

"Probably saying she wants you to-," said Sirius before he was sniped across the face by a pillow. Remus read quietly on his bed, a pillow missing and listened intently as Frank handed the folded parchment to James.

Excitement balled up in the pit of James' stomach. What did this mean?

James took the parchment from Frank, and opened it.

_Got you! Lily Evans' first prank ever_!

James rolled his eyes with a chuckle. He turned it over, and read…

_Goodnight! See you in the morning_.

And then there was a little heart next to _Yours Truly_.


	24. Peter's Peril

(A/N: 200! YAY! I love you guys! LoL, I'll give you some drama for your reward! (Be forewarned. I used a bit of creativity in this one that was probably false, but it sort of makes sense. Why would there only be one for all four Marauders? (You'll see what I mean)))

It was eleven thirty, and Peter was not back yet.

Remus seemed to be the only one worried. They were all playing cards, and Sirius was again loosing badly.

"Blasted game, it hates me," Sirius mumbled as he lost yet again.

"It's alright, mate, it's the luck of the cards," James clapped him on the back, smiling as he took the winnings from a gloomy Frank. No one noticed his murmur, "Merlin, now how am I going to pay for it?"

"I can't play anymore. You've got my very last knut," lied Remus, putting down the cards, and standing. "Anyways, I've got patrol tonight," Remus said, looking away as he pulled on his shoes and pinned on his Prefect badge.

Frank nodded, "James, I can't deal with your luck anymore. I'm gonna take a shower," Frank said and did as he said.

Remus faked a yawn, "Well, don't miss me," he lied. He hated lying, but he had to go find Peter. Every time he'd mentioned it before the thought had been dismissed with a "He'll be back," or "Moony, you worry too much," and Peter might do something drastic, like throw himself off the North Tower.

"Ah, poor chap. Look what you do to him, James. Here, take my mirror," Sirius said, handing the mirror to Remus. "We'll keep you awake," he grinned. "Now, James, all or nothing. I'll beat you at wizard's chess."

"Of course you will! I'm terrible at it," James was saying as Remus held the mirror in his hand, which was shaking. A mirror?

He headed toward the entrance of the dormitory.

"Exactly, which means I win, so just hand it all over now!"

"Alright, alright, I'll play, but you promise to have to pay Moony back all the bets you owe him," James joked as the door closed behind Remus. He was still looking at the mirror in fascination and joy.

They trusted him with this, one of their most valuable items. They cared enough to stay in contact with him, to make sure he didn't fall asleep in the hallway. They probably had no idea what this meant to him. They were his best friends, and he theirs. This was like a pact of some sort to him.

And he was probably being grossly sentimental.

He shook off the happiness, and went directly out of the portrait hole, and took out his map. There were- or had been- four Marauders maps. One had been confiscated by Filch, the other torn to pieces in a D.A.D.A. accident. The one in Remus' hands was his, and the last kept safe by James, seeing as the other two hadn't been able to keep theirs safe and they hadn't made more due to the fact that they had barely passed third year grades trying to make these maps.

"I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good," Remus smiled at the incantation.

The parchment became a map, and Remus searched the dots.

Nope, didn't want McGonagall, or the Hufflepuff Common Room, and he wasn't sure that he wanted to know what two Ravenclaws were doing in the broom closet on the second floor.

But what was Peter doing in the dungeons? With Snape and Avery?

They'd caught Peter! Was he in trouble? Of course he was, he was with Slytherins!

And what by Godric was Nymphadora Tonks doing following him?

He spun around, and glared at the first year in her pajamas who had hid successfully in the shadows.

"What are you doing here!?" he demanded in a whisper.

She started at being caught. "How'd you know I was here? I was so sure I didn't knock into anything," she said unhappily, coming out of the shadows to meet him. Remus rolled his eyes when she stubbed her bare footed toe on the knight's armor she'd been hiding behind.

"You didn't. You were extremely stealthy, now get back to bed," he told her in hushed tones, though they were impatient and angry.

"No," she said simply, and he inhaled furiously.

"Look, Nymphadora, you have to go now. I can't risk having you caught by Filch!" he said, a half truth none the less. If she was caught, he would have to get her out of a mess.

"So you're not going to get caught by Filch?" she frowned.

"No, I'm not. I'm a Prefect, remember?" he explained, showing her his badge.

That stumped her for a moment, before she shrugged it off.

"Prefect, smeefect, I'm coming," Nymphadora said with a wide, Marauder-worthy grin. But he couldn't play games right now. What if Peter was…? Uh! He didn't want to imagine what could be happening to Peter right then and he couldn't deal with Nymphadora right now. He couldn't take her along. What if she got hurt? Sirius would kill him where he stood. But he knew the look Nymphadora was giving him. It was the stubborn one Sirius wore, and it meant either asking a million questions, or explaining along the way.

"No, you're not. I need to go down to the dungeons-."

"Why?" she demanded.

"Because Peter's in trouble-" he tried to explain.

"How'd you know?"

"Because of this," he said, waving the map edgily in front of her. Her bright violet eyes followed it in interest before she snatched it away. However, it was her turn to be interrupted. Remus said tensely, because he didn't know what to do, "Look, just, just come on, alright?"

Her triumphant smile played along beside him as they ran along the hallway. He gave an exasperated sigh, and at the same time he was grateful for her presence for some reason.


	25. Back Up

It was about half way to Peter when Remus realized they should probably call for back up.

"James? James? Sirius? Hello?"

James leapt for the mirror to make any excuse to get away from the miserable chess game as Sirius was urging his knight to take James' queen which had been James' last resort. He was loosing, as Sirius had predicted, and Sirius was lording it (with brotherly like glee) over him. And, "accidentally" James swore later on, the chess board was flipped off by James' knee, the pieces shrieking their terror, and Sirius howling his disappointment.

"Remus, what's the matter?" James said, smiling openly at the end of the game and Sirius' severe disappointment.

But his jovial mood was changed by the look on Remus' face. "Peter- he's in trouble."

"What?" James asked, astonished, and mortified at once. He knew Remus' famous understatements. Remus had a tendency to blanket the truly terrible to make it seem like it wasn't a catastrophe and that there was hope.

"How?" Sirius demanded from behind James. He didn't seem to care about the chess game anymore.

"He's in the dungeons, with Snape and Avery and some other Slytherins," panted Remus, who appeared like he was running because his face bobbed this way and that and his hair was flying out of his face which was a bit pink. "Come, quickly, please!"

"We're coming," said James solemnly, and Sirius nodded beside him.

A look of relief filled Remus' face. "Hurry."

He ended contact.

"Come on," James said, but Sirius was pulling on his shoes with more zeal than he'd ever done before.

In the Common Room they met something they hadn't suspected, and wished desperately that they'd put the cloak on before they had entered the room. James had just barely finished pinning his Head Boy badge on when they heard the shriek.

"-just because you both have boyfriends you leave me out of everything!" yelled a distraught Mary who had her wand out. Her eyes were full of tears and she was red in the face. Some of her hair was wet, and on the whole she looked unhappy. Lily had her hands towards Mary, as though wanting to soothe her with a sympathetic gesture and Alice was trying to talk to Mary.

"We don't mean-." Alice tried to come towards her and give her a sisterly pat on the back, but Mary pulled away, and Alice's reward for her kindness was more screaming.

"Yes you do! You always do!" she said as her scream faded into a sob. However, when she noticed Lily looking at James, she ventured quietly, "Who are you looking at-? Oh," Mary turned to see James starring at him with Sirius trying to silently make him leave the scene. Completely embarrassed, Mary collapsed, in what appeared to be a faint, her bathrobe flowing like a dress around her.

Alice shrieked, and went directly to help her friend.

Lily did too, but when they realized that she was still breathing and she had only fainted from exhaustion ("It must be the courses. We've always helped her get through her homework in the past and now we're always a bit preoccupied," Alice said, and Lily nodded as they put her on the couch) Lily had her head cocked at James.

_What are you doing_?

"Nothing," he said quickly, shrugging guiltily when they tried to walk away.

She frowned.

_Where were you going?_

"The kitchens," he lied quickly. Sirius groaned. He knew how bad a liar James was when it came to his friends.

She gave him a _yeah right_ look.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Look, Prongs, we haven't got time for this."

James nodded solemnly, "Love you, Lily," and blew her a kiss before he slipped through the portrait hole and away.

Alice didn't know where the three of them had gone.


	26. The Start of a Duel

Sirius and James raced down the hallway. Sirius was mumbling to himself about Peter always getting himself into trouble, but was otherwise quiet. They barely made a sound though they ran. They'd learned through years of practicing escaping from teachers in the dead of night how to be silent.

However the tension in the air made enough noise for them both.

Adrenaline pumped through their veins as they ran. Peter was in danger. Slytherins hadn't ever taken kindly to Gryffindors, much less Marauders. Especially Snape. "Bloody, greasy haired Snape," he heard Sirius murmur. The invisibility cloak was draped over James' shoulder and the map was in Sirius' hands as he pointed them on in the quickest route without running into anybody. It was insane that the predecessors hadn't put in a single tunnel to get to the dungeons, like a muggle elevator, James thought as they bolted down the Marble staircase and they both jumped the last five steps without missing a beat. It must've had something to with being an animagus.

That's when they heard the footfalls.

James whirled around. Neither of them had noticed the person on the map.

Lily Evans, still in her pajamas no less, was running after them, with sweat on her brow and breathing hard though you couldn't hear a sound from her.

He looked at her exasperated as they came to a stop near the entrance to the dungeons in front of the Great Hall. "What are you doing here, Lily?" he demanded.

She gave him a _Well, what do you think_?

"I can take care of myself, Lily," James said, trying to sound angry.

_I never doubted that. I just wanted to make sure that someone was watching your back_, Lily's expression said with a fierce look in her eye, drawing her wand.

James shook his head, now his look worried, "NO, Lily, you can't come. Go back to bed. We've got it covered."

_I'm coming_.

"You're not."

_Watch me._

"Lily, we're not even discussing this," James said, panic in his voice. "Look, we've got to hurry. Peter could be in trouble, and maybe even Remus, but not you too."

"Get over the lover's spat and come on!" Sirius whispered and then cursed when he looked at the Map, "McGonagall," he said shortly. James groaned and flung the invisibility cloak over Lily and Sirius.

The voice of the aforementioned lady came crisp through the air.

"Potter, what are you doing out of bed this late?"

"Patrol, Professor," smiled James, motioning to his badge. He had his hands held behind his back and looked like a proper up-to-nothing school boy.

That was an immediate sign for the Professor.

"Where's Evans?" she questioned, beady eyed.

"In bed. She's been exhausted lately," he said, smiling sympathetically. "I took Remus with me instead. He was happy enough to come with me."

"Ah… and where is he?" McGonagall said her eyes unable to see him in the darkness of the night. She'd bought the lie with ease as usual.

"In the dungeons. I forgot my badge and had to go back to get it," James lied smoothly.

"Well, I'll leave the patrolling up to you then. Hurry up, Potter," she said with a swish of her skirts. "Who knows what might happen in the dungeons," came the sarcastic remark. She must've been tired to question Dumbledore's orders.

"Yeah, who knows," James muttered darkly, and then motioned for the others to go down the stairs.

Sirius offered him the cloak once McGonagall was out of sight.

Lily looked imploringly at him as Sirius started down the stairs. _Why didn't you tell McGonagall?_

"If Remus and Peter were caught dueling they'd be at risk of being expelled. Anyways, I haven't had a good fight in a long time," he said with a casual smile as he took her hand in a swift movement and dragged her down the stairs after him even though he could tell that she had a half a million other questions in her face.

Sirius led them on their decent of the stairs and then headed down a hallway. James followed with Lily in tow, gripping his wand. He was working on a plan and a list of spells. He would have to hide Lily under the cloak while they dueled, but then she was in danger of a cross fire or a miss directed spelled. A shield charm would do… if she stayed in one place.

The tension was so eminent from Lily she would've shone like a star if tension could radiate light. James could feel it in her hand as she clamped his until it was numb.

She'd never been in a duel before. She'd thrown hexes around, maybe, had target practice, but that wasn't a real duel. Nothing compared to a real duel. James remembered his first in his first year (hexing someone's sandcastle with his dad's wand didn't count). He and Malfoy had had it out, with him in the loosing end. Lily couldn't be on the loosing end in a battle with Death Eaters. Malfoy had been toying with him. The Death Eaters wouldn't "toy".

This was too complicated.

They turned on a hallway again, and heard a yell. Both James and Sirius sped up, but then James stopped.

"Look, Lily," he said, draping the cloak over her shoulders, "Go back to the Tower. I'll see you there, I promise. Avoid as many rugs and chandleries as possible. Peeves pranks with those," he said with a half hearted smile. Only her head was visible, and it held the expression of a determined face, but he ignored the look that yelled _I'm not leaving_! "And if you even think of going to get help or coming to help yourself, I'll- I'll-," but he never got to finish the threat. The problem was brought to them.

Something exploded over James' head.

Swiftly James covered Lily's ducking head with his hands and pushed her against the wall before yelling _"Reducto!"_ in Snape's direction.


	27. Ten Minutes Before

(A/N: This chapter is pretty tense and a bit unrealistic… of course a battle between miniature Death Eaters and Order Members is obviously very promising.)

Remus, ten minutes before, had been racing down the stairs. Nymphadora, in his wake, had fallen over a statue, slid down a few stairs, and had nearly tripped on her own pajama pants before Remus had caught her.

"Is this a habit with you?" he demanded quietly, setting her upright.

"Since birth," she sighed, "Though I've never had so much clumsiness all at once. It must be your fault."

He rolled his eyes, partially amused, but continued by motioning for her to move forward and hurried after her down the stairs.

"When are we going to get there?" Nymphadora demanded, panting.

"Soon," he promised, a bit irritated at her eagerness. But she had no idea what a duel was like, after all. She'd never even seen one, most likely.

They found the entrance to the room without problem.

The problem was getting Nymphadora to stay away from the problem.

"Look, Remus, I'm coming."

"No, you're not."

"Yeah I am."

"Not over my dead body."

"Then over your living one."

"_Nymphadora_!"

He finally locked her in a broom closet a few corridors from the place with a _silencio_ charm to her rather loud un-enjoyment before creeping away to the scene of Peter's peril.

Remus, not the one to barge in with smoke and fire, peeked in to see the situation. Peter was sitting on a stool, not looking as terrified as Remus had expected him to be in this sort of problem (on which Remus congratulated Peter's ability to mask his probable horror), and was talking rapidly to Snape in front of him, who was holding his wand aloft with a _lumos_ charm on it with a gang of well known school kid Death Eaters around the place.

"… then at nine thirty they go out together and patrol for about two hours, or if they have latter patrol they stay up together, or if it's really late they take a nap on the couch. It all depends on the day."

"Do they ever separate?" Mulciber, another Slytherin from sixth year, asked dully. He wasn't very entertained. His were the fingers that drummed on a desk in the potion's classroom.

"Do they ever separate when going on patrol?" Snape asked more directly.

"No, they always go together," Peter said nervously, his eyes shifting.

"Then here's your task," Snape said, handing Peter a piece of paper. "You've got to get them to seper-."

But Peter's shifting eyes had landed on Remus at that moment, and instead of keeping a straight face, his eyes widened in horror for some reason. Snape turned to see what Peter was so worried about and saw Remus.

Remus' head whipped 'round and there stood Nymphadora, wand drawn and ready with a mischievous grin on her heart shaped face without a real care in the world, until she saw his face.

He merely pushed her along at a run as a hex shot over head.

"Get the werewolf!" someone shrieked.

"_Expelliarmus!"_ Remus yelled, turning half of his body around and shooting a hex at Mulciber who'd fired the hex before. They still ran. The next corridor was their only hope. They were open- or was the muggle term sitting? - ducks here. The corridor would provide shelter for a range of attacks, unless they blew the stone up.

A few hexes overhead caused rock to crumble and fall from above.

He pushed Nymphadora forward, trying to make her go faster even though he was sprinting as hard as he could.

"_Avada Kedavra_!" someone yelled and the words made Remus' mind to freeze in panic. The numb sensation caused adrenaline to rush through his body as the green spell missed. If they'd do it once they'd do it again.

Remus pushed Nymphadora around the corner before an _expelliarmus_ charm hit him. He crashed into the ground, the momentum of the force of the blow almost like a club of a troll.

His wand, his wand, where was his wand? He searched for it in panic as he ducked other spells. He spotted it, half way down the hall. Scrambling to his feet he ran for it, and heard Nymphadora yelling, "Expelliarmus!"

He barely missed being hit by a jinx before falling backwards and sliding forwards to grasp his wand. He jinx someone's legs together, and then sent up a shield to deflect the spell heading his way.

"Oi! Who started the party?" Sirius demanded and sent a Death Eater flying with a spell. "Guess it was you, wasn't it?" Sirius said to Remus. "And how come you brought Tonks?" he was talking to Remus as though they were at a super market and they had just stopped to talk before he went and got a head of lettuce.

"I didn't. She followed me- _repello! -_ and I couldn't make her go back," Remus said, slashing a spell with a repelling curse.

"Terrific- _confringo_- where's Peter?"

"He was talking to them. I don't know where he is-," Remus said before blasted backwards by a spell. He rolled to a stop in a daze, forgetting where he was and what he was doing.

"Remus! _Repello_! Remus!" Sirius yelled back at him. He was a gloomy figure amid sparks and blasts of lights.

Remus shook his head as though he'd just waken up, blinking his eyes to get rid of the weird haze.

"_Confundo_!" yelled Nymphadora. She was standing over him but everything was too blurry to see her expression. She was trying to drag him away. He stood, but it was like he was drunk. He couldn't walk straight; he could only see shapes and blurs. The noises around him were a jumble and he could barely keep the wand in his hand.

He fell on the floor when they stopped moving.

"Remus?" Nymphadora's words were blurred. "Remus?"

The lights were fading; he could barely make the outline of her face. It was though he was under murky water. His brain was malfunctioning. He couldn't think straight. It was shutting off.

"Remus?" Sirius' voice was barely recognizable.

"Remus!" Nymphadora's voice was panicked and registered slowly in his ears. "He's bleeding so much," her voice sounded tearful.

"Don't cry… I'll be alright," he thought but it came out slurred and disoriented, like a groan of sorts. .

His eyes were closing. He felt himself going limp with a strange tiredness. The deep blackness consumed him, and he knew no more.


	28. Duel

James covered Lily's head with the cloak, and struck out at Snape with venom. He repelled the spell, moving forward, and cast a spell at him. James deflected it with his wand, moving away from Lily to detract attention from her even though she was already invisible.

"Potter," Snape recognized him with a spat. His eyes gleamed with gilded hatred and he clearly had "Kill" in his eyes. He knew the look well enough seeing it as many times as Snape came around.

"Snape," James replied as though he were glad to see him in a voice dripping with sarcasm. He made a mock bow, he said in the same falsely cheered voice, "Haven't missed you much." He glared defiantly at Snape with the smirk he often wore with the eyes. It had a nice, confident effect on all of his opponents. The more worried his was inside, the more arrogant and aloof he looked on the outside.

They circled, judging each other, and waiting for the other to stop waiting and to let their impatient side get the best of them, or even worse, their anger which was dense in the hallway.

James always looked for Lily, even though she was invisible, he could feel her close by. It was the feeling he had when his friends wore the cloak with out him. He wished she was visible to him in some way. Even though love was blind, shouldn't you be able to sense it or something?

He let thoughts of Lily fade to the back of his mind while defending Lily came to the front. The fierce anger in his eyes strengthened, and he saw Snape wonder what had been the inspiration to him.

Snape was the first to throw a spell, either anger or impatience getting to him first James never even pondered. It lashed out like a bolt of blue lightning, and James countered it, and thought swiftly _Impedimenta_ with a swish of his wand. Snape was forced to pause a moment before he could counter James other spell that he'd followed up, which had a nice flash of orange to it.

More bolts of energy on each side in a vast array of colors, and each was countered or repelled fiercely. James' eye narrowed when he saw Snape wave his wand without a color coming from it, and over stepped while putting up a shield.

Snape had used an invisible tripping jinx on James. He fell over, but managed to roll away from Snape's _cruciatus_ curses before sending a blasting curse at Snape. He had to deflect it, but it gave James enough time to get on his feet.

"How come you have to be so good?" James said with a grin, dodging by moving his body to the side instead of repelling the spell cast at him.

"How come you have to be so bad?" Snape countered with a taste of victory in his sarcasm as he countered a Jelly-Brain jinx that James threw his way.

"Touché," James grinned, his normally warm hazel eyes frostbitten, and thought violently, _Confringo_. The beam of red sparked across the room and hit its desired target to James' relief.

Snape exploded into the wall, his back fire too slow. James was lucky. Snape never normally slipped up in a fight.

James went to finish up his spell with a body bind curse, but Snape was quicker at recovering than James had expected.

The _cruciatus_ curse would have hit him straight on, if not for the hex sent his way. He fell back in astonishment. What had that been? James leapt to his feet, and he felt the shift of fabric near him. A smile played on his lips.

"_Incarcerous_," Snape shot, and James was bound in ropes before he registered to counter the rapid spell. They wound securely around his body, and around his mouth like a gag. James couldn't help but fall over.

"Got you, Potter," he said, standing over James. Snape stepped on James' wand hand, and James let go of his wand before Snape kicked him in his stomach hard. "You deserve this. You deserve death for everything you've done against me. You deserve every last minute of your defeat until your impending demise," the black eyes were as cold as ever as Snape pointed his wand at James, a foot on James' stomach as though he were a piece of land he had just claimed title over, but the force was enough so James couldn't move. James only glared back in anger, pain still throbbing in his abdomen. "_Cruccio_," Snape said with a smile, and James writhed in agony. He had clamped his mouth shut around the rope, but a moan escaped him.

"_Avada Ke_-,"

Snape was bowled over by air. He yelped in surprise. Something was hitting him, hard. Blood poured from Snapes' large nose, and James heard the crack when it broke. A few sparks of light showered Snape from nowhere, and he howled. Snape kicked what James knew to be Lily off of him, and cried, "What is that-?"

He was hexed into the wall a moment later, and slid to the floor, appearing to have blacked out.

James, relieved, breathed a sigh of the emotion he felt as Lily jinxed the rope from his body. He shabbily made to stand, and he felt Lily's hands help him up.

"I thought I was done," he said to her shakily, and suddenly she was holding him tightly. It was so odd to hug thin air, but it was worth it. He found the top of her head, and kissed it, wishing he could see her more than ever. "Thank you, Li-."

"_Sectumsempra_!"

James didn't move Lily quickly enough.


	29. The Werewolf's Waking Moments

When the light hit his eyes he woke.

He lurched up, thinking that some sort of spell had been fired at him, and scrambling for his wand behind him. His hands hit a pillow.

But then he realized that he was in the Hospital Wing. The white beds that lined the room were almost empty. There were only four occupants in the beds, but he didn't register them automatically. His head ached as though it'd been slit open and sewed back together.

He brought his hand to his head, and felt the trace of a new scar that lined his cheek to cross his nose and flow to the other side of his forehead. It was a thin line, and it wasn't much of a bump to his hand… but how could he have gotten another scar? It wasn't full moon… But he'd been in a duel, not becoming a werewolf.

Something caught his eye. Some_ones_.

In a chair next to him was Sirius, with his head lolled back and his mouth gaping wide, apparently asleep. Remus smiled slightly, a faint wish of having a camera flickering through his mind. Beside him, sprawled on a bed with her shoes on the pillow was Nymphadora, looking much more comfortable than her cousin. But instead of her hair being one of her regular vibrant colors, it was a beautiful shade of brunette, curly, massed around her arm she was using as a cushion. The dash of freckles across her nose was different as well. Was this how she normally was when she hadn't altered herself?

The puzzlement died off when he saw the bed opposite him, and anger panged at his heart. Peter Pettigrew, with what appeared to be vivid blue warts all over his body, lay on the bed.

Peter…

He hadn't had time to consider Peter last night (or so he hoped it was last night). What had Peter been doing, spewing information like that? There hadn't been a wand on him or anything! Had there? Remus hadn't gotten the best look.

Most likely there had been. Peter was probably in trouble and was panicking. He wouldn't just betray them like that. At least he was alright… mostly.

But still, Remus had this strange, lurking feeling in his heart. He trust in Peter had been shaken without him fully registering it. He pretended as though it were his fear or his guilt for his friend's injury. Peter could've been hurt by Remus, or Sirius, or Nymphadora.

He let his eyes wander again to another bed that was occupied.

He started as he saw James resting his head on Lily's bed, his arms his cushion. James' hands were wrapped in thick bandages, and his glasses had been removed to reveal a few more small cuts that were healing. He looked tired, even though he was sleeping, and very worried.

For a good reason.

Lily Evans seemed to be in pain. Lying on her stomach she slept, her mid drift more bulky than usual. Her face was deathly pale, making each of the freckles stand out on her face. Her hair was matted with sweat, and something dark.

Remus panicked himself when he saw it was blood.

He made to push himself out of bed when Madam Pomfrey bustled out, looking less worried then Remus himself felt, but worried all the same. She caught sight of his movement immediately after clucking over James being out of his bed.

"You, dearie, are supposed to be sleeping. It's only seven in the morning- you've only had five hours rest- and don't even think about arguing," she said when he opened his mouth to protest. She already had him cornered. She "helped" him back into bed, or was the actual word to be used "forced"?

"What about my friends?" Remus said, his voice a little more than a bit worried as he scanned Lily and James once more.

"They'll be fine, but they don't need you to wake them up at the moment. And this lot-," she motioned to Nymphadora and Sirius, who snored loudly at that moment, "Needs to get to class," she said with a shake of her head. Remus, though a bit comforted by her words, was nonetheless worried about them.

She offered him a potion, and he drank it obediently, his eyes still fixed on the two to his right. She fluffed up his pillow and took the empty potion bottle from his hand. The sleeping draught tasted much better than some other potions that he'd had to test out before.

"How did this happen again?" Madam Pomfrey asked when Remus yawned and slid himself between the sheets of the warm comfortable bed. Why had he left it again? "A potion's accident was what your friend said."

"Dunno, I don't think so… and then the Slytherins," Remus sighed as his eyelids drooped, realizing and not caring much that she had mixed the sleeping potion with a tad of verita serum. "They had Peter …so, so, we went and got him…"

"A ha," she said quietly to herself more than anyone else.

"Bu-but don't tell anyone… they'll get Peter expelled." Remus said before he closed his eyes.

"I won't tell, but I knew Miss Evans injury wasn't a Potions accident. Dumbledore agrees. Poor thing," she was mumbling to herself before her voice was incoherent to the sleeping Remus.


	30. What Happened

(A/N: Alright my readers, I have a question

(A/N: Alright my readers, I have a question (along with a thank you for your reading and replying skills! Almost 300 reviews!). What Harry Potter couples do you like best? Besides the obvious James/Lily? I need to know because I'm debating between a Remus/Tonks and a Harry/Ginny. Which should I do?)

(This is what happened).

James mind ceased up as he felt Lily go limp against him.

He didn't have time to even look at Snape or realize that his hands were bleeding too. He didn't even register it.

James tore the invisibility cloak from Lily as they sank to the floor, and cast it aside as blood dripped from it. But that didn't even cover Lily's back. Her pajamas were ruined (a frugal thought at a moment like this), the red from the wound seeping down her back. Frantic, he pulled her head towards his, her already red hair tinged with her own blood.

Her eyes were feverish, in pain, but closing, slowly, giving in. She didn't seem to recognize that he was even there. She didn't move, barely breathing, her face paler and paler by the second.

So much blood.

"Lily, Lily no!" he yelled as though it would wake her up.

His wand was slippery in his hand as he tried to heal her wound, but it wasn't working. He should have taken healing! his mind yelled. He should have moved Lily out of the way! He should kill Snape a thousand times in a thousand different ways! He should-

"Move!" Snape yelled as he rushed to them, and threw James' arm away. James didn't do anything as he felt in his pockets for the mirror, watching Snape doing something for Lily, and feeling completely helpless. But if Sirius and Remus came, they could move her. Or at least kill Snape for one of the thousand different deaths he would make up for him. Revenge wasn't important right now though.

"Sirius!"

No reply.

"Sirius, please! Please!"

He cast a spell that bound up the wound partially, but she was still bleeding. Snape worked heedlessly, letting his wand tip flow back and forth. There were three large deep cuts on her back. The two parts in the middle of the three cuts were where his hands had been.

"James! Remus is hurt!" yelled- of all people- Tonks through the mirror. "Sirius is fending the rest of them off! You've gotta get down here quick. He's bleeding so bad-" she whimpered, before all James saw was wall.

Nymphadora had been shouting at him while hexing. She'd not looked at his face, or she'd have known his horror. Was this only one emotion? He couldn't tell- he didn't care enough to tell-

"Hurry!" she yelled one more time before yelling a curse.

"Tonks, give me that thing!"

Sirius looked at him in the mirror. He saw his brother's distress. He didn't even ask what was wrong. "We're coming." The connection was gone. James pocketed the mirror.

"What's the spell?" he demanded of Snape.

"What?" Snape looked up frantically.

"The bloody spell you're using so I can help! What is it?" James yelled as though that would help the thought get through his head.

Snape told him the spell, and they used it together.

They needed to get her to the hospital wing. St. Mungo's… Something!

James mind was screaming. Lily was so pale, too pale, too pale…

"We have to get her out of here-," James' voice was so feeble. "Now, or else we won't be able to-," he couldn't say _save her._ She was going to be saved. He would die at least ten different savage deaths before he let Lily Evans die.

"You idiot. If you move her now she'll loose even more blood. This spell will only seal a wound for a while," Snape said coldly, coolly, as though this didn't matter to him. James' already shot nerve system electrified him with the thought of revenge. James almost killed him then and there. Lily was more important than revenge on so many counts. "You should go get Madam Pomfrey."

"I'm not bloody running all the way up to the Hospital Wing and leave her here with you," James' spat, continuing to bind up Lily's wound.

"Jealousy won't get you anywhere in life, Potter. She's fading fast," Snape said in that calm, cool, heartless voice.

"We're going to bring her up to Madam Pomfrey. She's going to- she won't- have enough time- if we don't," he said in a choked voice.

"What is this bastard doing here!?" Sirius' voice came from behind. "What the ruddy-," he started to say as Snape continued to heal Lily's form along with James. "Lily-," he breathed. "We've got to get her up to the Hospital wing along with Remus, though he isn't as bad as this… C'mon."

"You're all idiots!" Snape yelled, rage and worry making his voice thick. Emotions finally made the heartless voice leave. "She'll die if you move her anywhere. The spell won't let you carry her up the stairs like some sack of gold. Her skin will break open and she'll bleed to death!"

"Sirius, Sirius," Tonks breathed, and before her floated Remus on a moving, wheel-less bed. "Hurry up! They're breaking through!" But she spotted Lily, and froze.

"We're taking her to the Hospital Wing on one of those," Sirius said.

"You can't move her at all!" Snape spat.

Sirius stepped forward and grabbed Snape up by the scruff of the neck. "If you don't want to die, you'll move," he said, his eyes furrowed and his face scarier than Tonks had ever seen. James couldn't recall a time when he'd seen so much hatred from his brother.

Snape hexed Sirius, but Sirius, who'd let go of Snape, only skittered a few inches when he deflected the blow.

Tonks stepped in between them, staring dead at Sirius. "Do it and Remus and Lily will die," she said, her eyes brimming with tears.

James- in the meantime- had conjured what Remus was riding on, and lifted Lily onto it. She wasn't heavy, but the dead weight was hard to lift. For some reason, his hands hurt. A lot. But he didn't care.

As he lay her on her stomach, Lily's eyes half opened, and she registered the blur in front of her eyes. "James…"

But before he knew it, she'd lolled back into an unconscious state.

She'd just said his name.

How? How was that possible?

They arrived at the Hospital Wing. James hadn't even registered the trip. He was light headed, but Lily and Remus needed to see Madam Pomfrey. That was what mattered. Lily. Remus… Lily.

Snape had been right (where had Snape run off to? James wondered momentarily). The movement had broken her skin as they'd run to the Hospital Wing. He patched her back up though, but the blood wouldn't seem to dry on his hands. It kept coming and coming.

But that didn't matter.

Sirius and Tonks were with Remus beside him, and Remus went through with them first. James pushed Lily through, so light headed. Everything was blurry, but how? He was wearing his glasses. So dizzy… The thought of all that mattered to him passed through his mind.

Madam Pomfrey shrieked, and helped Remus first. He had come in first. But that didn't take long, even if James thought every minute was an hour. Every minute… Every second she could die. No, Lily, no.

"Please, Madam Pomfrey," James said, clutching Lily's bed to stand as Madam Pomfrey grimaced in panic at the wound. "Save her. Please."

"I'll fix her up, dear. It won't take long, though it's a hard spell to cast."

He watched her for what seem like millennium, and when Madam Pomfrey looked like she was done asked the question he was dying to ask.

"Will she be alright?"

"She'll be fine, James, don't worry. She just needs to heal," Madam Pomfrey said comfortingly. That's all he needed to hear. He staggered a bit, and Sirius, behind him, caught him, and got his hand sticky with the blood that wouldn't dry on James' hand.

"She said my name," he muttered to himself. "She said my name."

The last thing he heard was Sirius' cry of horror when he saw nothing but black and two specks of shimmering emerald for Lily's eyes.


	31. The Blushing Effect

(A/N: YAY! Everyone, we've hit three hundred! Thank you, thank you, thank you! And I'm going to have to do both Harry/Ginny and Remus/Tonks at the same time. You guys were tied (I think).)

James still lay asleep in the Hospital Wing.

Day two hadn't brought him back to consciousness.

Lily was by James's side, waiting (if by his side meant the bed next to him). Remus and sometimes Sirius and Tonks were allowed in. Everyone else that was so concerned didn't gain access to the Hospital Wing, much less their friends. Even Alice and Mary were turned away, much to their dismay. Mary even faked sick trying to see Lily, but it didn't happen.

James had apparently lost more blood than Lily had.

_Lily opened her eyes, only to watch James crumble to the ground. _

_It was like a muggle horror movie to the worst extent where the boy who's done so much to protect the girl dies. He was so pale. Too pale. She burst into tears and made to help him, screaming his name silently, and then was in extreme pain. Her back put her in enough agony to lay down again as Sirius did her yelling for her, helped him onto a bed for her, and ordered Madam Pomfrey to help him. _

_"Prat!" muttered Sirius as Madam Pomfrey casted spells over James' hands, "The bloody bugger! Too busy to be worried about himself. The idiotic wanna be hero bloodying bugger!" He pushed his hair back just like James did, but it had a bad affect. Unlike James it made his hair frizz in unwanted areas. _

_James hair didn't do that. It swished and fell back into place with a wind swept look. Oh she'd used to think him so arrogant for doing it, but it was always so handsome… he was so handsome… so pale… to horror-struck. His glasses were lop sided on his face, his eyes closed, sweat on his brow. _

_His eyes needed to open. She wanted to see the hazel, and only the hazel. _

She'd cried herself to sleep that night when Madam Pomfrey had given her sleeping potion (which Lily could've made a bit more tastefully), and told her that crying wouldn't help James, and that he was going to be fine… in a while.

How long was a while? Was a while like a week? Or was it more like how Lily was going to get her voice back "in a while"? She couldn't live without him that long. She needed someone to scold, to laugh with, and to talk to, for someone to understand her.

And he was hurt because of her. He was this way because of her. If she hadn't been such a baby and had collapsed immediately- if she'd thrown James out of the way- if she put Snape out of her misery- if- if...

"_Stop," Remus said. "Lily Evans, I would have thought that you would have run out of tears by now. Merlin, you're worse than Sirius." _

_She gave him a mean look, and wiped the budding tears from her eyes. _

_"He'll be fine. Madam Pomfrey is a certified doctor, and could have been head of St. Mungo's if she'd wanted to," Remus pointed out. Lily looked up, surprised. Could the plump little nurse really be Head of St. Mungo's? _

_"Mr. Lupin, don't lie to your friends," snapped Madam Pomfrey, bustling in and handing him a potion. She seemed more blustery than usual though, and was that a blush? Lily smiled at the thought of the nurse being embarrassed. The lady pretended to be made of stone sometimes. _

_"You could have been in five years. You were the head of your class," Remus said with a grin before taking the potion like a shot of fire whisky. He shuddered, and made a nasty look behind Madam Pomfrey's back._

_Lily did too. This potion (even though she had no idea what it was) needed to be sweetened in some way. At least given the potion a better flavor than troll trash. She'd figure out what it was and make a whole of a lot better stock of it for everyone else that had to take it. Maybe she would invent it and be famous… And then when James had to take it he wouldn't have to grimace, and he'd tell her she was brilliant._

_Daydreaming didn't help… well, not exactly. _

Lily could now get up and walk around, but only under Madam Pomfrey's eye, just to make sure that she would be able to actually do something on her own (though she was probably right- Lily did get light headed more often than not with so much blood gone, and even though she'd given James a transfusion, she wouldn't give Lily one because it was "hard to find your exact blood type and a duplicate of your blood would make you sick" according to Madam Pomfrey. But apparently James' blood type was easy to reproduce and wouldn't hurt him. Then she went into overdrive technicalities and didn't realize that her listener was tuning her out.

She stood up now, and walked on the cold floor, over to his bed. He felt less clammy than yesterday. A lot less clammy. His pulse was better too. Madam Pomfrey confirmed it before going to her room again. He was improving. His blood was restoring inside of him.

Lily smiled a bit at moonrise. Nearly a beautiful full moon. Finally, something to be happy about. James was getting better.

Remus was going to be released in two days, and herself in "maybe" four. James was getting better, and when he woke up she would tell him- or communicate to him- how sorry she was.

Soon Remus was sleeping restlessly in the wake of the moon, his hair scarily silver in its light. He obviously didn't sleep well if there was light around.

She'd been supposed to be asleep about two hours ago, and had woken up about twenty minutes ago, restless. She was tired of being here, tired of being worried, tired of being tired, and tired of waiting for those hazel eyes to open. So tired of everything.

She patted his hair back from his pale face, though it was less pale now. It looked almost like how he did it when he swept it back himself. She smiled. His hair was soft, but not fluffy. It was a strange texture… and the look wasn't completed without his glasses.

She smiled when he snored a little bit. At least he had relaxed into a sleep.

She blinked, and sighed a bit, closing her eyes. James was right here, with her. They were fine, just fine. No one could get them here. A safe haven. She smiled. Smiling was comfortable with him around.

Someone caught her hand that she'd laid on his chest. She jolted, half stumbling away. James smiled at her through squinted eyes. He couldn't see her properly. He sat up, but Lily pushed him back down, hurriedly.

"Lily," he smiled, closing his eyes again, "I'm so glad you're ok."

She nudged him, Of course I'm ok.

"Talk to me," he said, waiting for her to speak. She gaped, thinking that he should at least remember that she was still mute. "C'mon," his smile growing, "You said my name earlier, I heard you, spit it out. Say something."

What? was the only thought she had.

"Lily?" he said, looking up at her, his eyes now open, "Don't prank me. You said my name earlier, right before I fainted," he said, propping himself up on his elbow.

She shook her head, her eyes never leaving his.

He rolled his eyes, "Fine then, prank me, but at least say something of value when you do." He groped for what she thought might be his glasses.

She shook her head harder, and handed him his glasses for him. He put them on, and discerned her face. He peered harder as though she were still blurry.

"Are you sure?" he demanded.

She nodded, wishing it really was only a prank.

"Oh…"

She looked away, sorry for disappointing him.

He took her chin, and made her face him.

"You need to stop worrying so much," he smiled, and leaned up to kiss her, but she pushed him back down, blushing.

"Now there's an emotion I can't read that well," he said, putting his head on his pillow as she tucked him into bed. She blushed some more. "I should make you blush more often," he smiled with a chuckle, but winced at the bruise on his ribs. Where Sev had kicked him.

She gave him a look that clearly told him _Don't or else_.

"Blushing makes you look even more adorable," he said. She tried to hide her smile, she really did, and the blush was getting worse by the second. She tried to give him an _As if_ look, but it didn't come out so well.

"And it makes me happy to see that I actually do affect you," he said quietly, looking away, "Like you do to me."

There was silence. Lily couldn't have done anything to break it, even if she'd known what to say. But his hazel eyes lit up on her blush.


	32. Moony's Miniature Visitor

Remus- in the mornings- had serious problems with amnesia. But only right after he'd just woken up. He would remember the battle- the fight- trying to get Nymphadora to escape. Sometimes- like the morning before when Madam Pomfrey had questioned him- he'd forget for hours (his record was two hours and fourteen minutes). This meant that he had to stay longer (only for another day). Which was bad. He could only learn so many things by text book and miss class, but that wasn't all.

James had improved immensely. Four days after the battle he could take the bandages off and was made to go back to student life at Hogwarts. Lily, however, had not. Her blood wouldn't multiply quickly enough, giving her dizzy spells, so Madam Pomfrey had given her a transfusion. It had only made things worse. Lily was now unconscious half of the day, with a fever too high for regular muggle standards. Madam Pomfrey said it would be the muggle blood verses the magical blood, and that they needed to be balanced, so she would have to have another transfusion today.

James didn't like this. Not one bit.

Remus could only imagine what it would be like in his shoes. Being so worried he spent more time with her than with his studies, telling her stories and making her smile when she was awake, and when she was asleep, he would sit, or pace, or try to talk to Remus casually. Nothing worked though. Madam Pomfrey must've known that this was going to be bad to begin with. She was now saying she should have left Lily to recover on her own.

Once, Remus had woken up in the middle of the night- nightmares again- to hear Professor Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall whispering over her. He hadn't really caught what they said, which was saying something with his "enhanced" hearing. But he got the gist of it. Lily Evans was not recovering like she was supposed to.

Plus- even worse- Remus' favorite time of the month was coming around. The full moon gave him awful nightmares… really, really bad ones that he refused to think about during day lit hours, or he might as well go insane with fear.

James came for his morning check up, and left- skipping breakfast to watch her sleep- and telling Remus.

"She looks a bit better today, doesn't she?" he asked, looking at her, and caressed her hair back away from her face.

"Definitely," Remus agreed hastily.

James turned his worried look on Remus. It was agonizing to watch. "It's today, isn't it?"

"What?" Remus lied quickly. As if he didn't know.

"The transfusion of muggle blood. It's today. Madam Pomfrey won't tell me because I fret too much," James gave a half hearted smirk before turning to look at Lily again. "Don't lie. It's alright."

There was a deafening silence.

"Where's Sirius?" Remus wondered aloud. At least he knew how to cheer James up. Remus was clueless when it came to making James feel better. That was Sirius' forte as the brother. Remus was only the sympathetic one-child of a family cousin. And maybe Peter was related… but Remus had barely seen him after the- ah- conflict. And he still had the nagging feeling that he shouldn't trust him.

"He had to study with Mary… I think. I don't think he likes coming here anyways… it… well, I don't blame him," he smiled faintly, no longer looking at Remus.

He seemed entranced by her. Remus wondered if he'd ever feel the same way about someone that James did about Lily.

The bell rang. James jolted to a start.

"Well, better get going," he grinned, and looked outside at a glance, and groaned, "It's snowing again."

James hated the snow. Because he didn't like the cold. He didn't like not being able to hop on his broomstick anytime he wanted to either. Remus didn't understand this. He loved the snow. It was one of his favorite times of the year. Maybe it was that one season was desolate with him. One season that was unloved, uncared about, except Remus.

James left with one last glance and had to run to make it before the bell.

Remus sighed, perplexed, and taking a candy bar from the desk next to him. He'd gotten many of things ever since it was official that he was incased in there. Lily had too. But the roses of other lovers that professed their love and profound devotion to her somehow when missing.

"Psst!" someone hissed in a quiet voice.

Remus jumped, and Nymphadora Tonks stood beside him on his bed… in miniature. She looked the same old Nymphadora, just pixie sized. Could metamorphmagi do that? Somehow she'd climbed up onto his bed and he hadn't even noticed.

"How'd you-?" he blinked, his eyes still huge.

"Shrinking spell," she told him. "Could you make me big again? Madam Pomfrey just left for some reason. I figured I'd make you feel better," she smiled at him from on his knee. "Sirius said you and James were too depressed for anyone within ten years of your age groups."

Remus rolled his eyes, "Nymphadora, it's your first year. You can't skip to come see me!"

"And why not? I already know most of Transfiguration anyways, if you hadn't noticed," she frowned, "And it's Tonks. Can you make me big now?"

"Pocket sized Nymphadora. Once in a life time opportunity… nah," he said with a smirk worthy of Potter or Black quality, laying his hand down in front of her.

"Remus John Lupin!"

(A/N: Is his middle name really John? 'Cause I'll change it if it's not.)

She gave him a look, and he had to grin wolfishly.

His bad mood was completely gone. Why had he been in a bad mood in the first place? She had vivid pink hair today- a really nice bubblegum shade.

"I like the hair color today," he commented, "Hurry, get on my hand."

"So you can toss me half way across the room? No way," she said, crossing her arms. Before sitting on his hand. He smiled again and brought her up to his face.

"On my honor I won't," he said with his other hand in the air, "Or you'd jinx me into oblivion."

"True," she said, and laughed, "You have no idea how weird this is," she told him, sitting cross legged on his hand.

"I might have some incentive," he offered, and moved his hand quickly enough that she toppled over backwards. He laughed a bit, before she got herself up and pinched his hand. He winced a bit, but still couldn't hold back a smile. "Want a jelly bean?"

"What flavors do you have?" she asked, looking at the open box eagerly. He picked out a handful and offered it to her. She lifted a hefty pink one onto her hand, and Remus tossed the rest into his mouth. She broke off a bit of hers and ate it. "Watermelon!" she exclaimed in delight. He was surprised, "My favorite. I love watermelon. It's the best taste in the world," she told him.

"Is it?" he said. "I haven't tried a bunch of it."

"We'll have to cure that, Mr. Lupin. Anyways, if you'd make me big again, I have something for you."

"What?" he asked curiously.

"Remus!" called Madam Pomfrey.

Nymphadora jumped nervously. Remus put his hand gently on the bed beside him and lifted up his legs to hide her from view. That last thing Nymphadora needed was to be caught in the Hospital Wing uninvited by Madam Pomfrey. That would be a problem.

"Yes?" he said back in a polite voice.

She'd brought some people with her. People that Remus had seen the last transfusion. She smiled at him. "You don't mind moving to the back of the ward to do some homework, do you dear?"

"Of course not," he said back in a falsely cheered voice. Not to mention he'd completed all of his homework (and Lily's with James help except for Ancient Runes which he had no idea how to do). He took the box of jelly beans and Nymphadora to the back of the room.

They both had grim faces as the operation started… but they were covered from noise and sight with spells and a curtain. Nymphadora gulped. Remus looked down at her.

"Another one?" she asked.

"Yes, to counter out her mixed blood… being directly muggle born apparently makes it more or less difficult to operate on," Remus said in a quiet voice as though a loud one would disturb what was going on.

"How come not on me?" Nymphadora asked, "I mean, I'm half and half, right? Wouldn't that make it hard as well? Because when they gave me a transfusion I never got sick like this."

"But apparently, if you have some magic from your predecessors then it makes you full magic or full non magic, I think. I'm not in Healing. We'll have to ask Lily… when she wakes up," he said with a shrug.

"Cheer up, she'll be alrigh', and you know it. James would commit a million murders to make sure of it," Nymphadora smile, patting his hand. He could barely feel it.

Remus smiled, "That's what I'm afraid of."

"Oh, here," said Nymphadora, "Happy early Christmas." She held up a small box. "But you have to make it big. And I know it's still the beginning of December but… oh well, you won't get anything else from me," she said with a smile as he took the miniscule box from her hand. "And this is partially from Sirius too," she continued to blab, "because he paid for most of it, but then because James and him are getting you- oh! I about told. I'll just shut up now…"

He grinned, "Don't tell me what they got me. And I can wait for this until Christmas." He handed it back to her. She pouted.

"Are you sure? Because Sirius said-."

"I'm positive, Nymphadora. I'm fine."

But then they both looked over at Lily's shielded bed, and knew that everything was not "fine."


	33. Demon's Indication

Severus Snape crept down the hallways, sneaking the stairs and avoiding everyone… even if they couldn't see him. His mind was whirling even though he was trying not to let it whirl.

But the dying face of Lily Evans continued to pop into his head. The constant feeling of her blood on his hands. The everlasting guilt. The need to be forgiven. Lily's green eyes in love with James Potter… Severus left alone…

He shook his head to clear it.

She was still sick, even if she wasn't dead.

She wasn't dead.

That was the only thing that gave him comfort.

But he had been the one to try and kill her. The guilt and hatred of himself swamped him for a moment, almost making his head burst. He tore himself from the inside out.

Severus Snape had almost killed Lily Evans out of spite for James Potter.

The least he could do was give her back her invisibility cloak, he said, trying to sidetrack himself. The one he'd washed the blood from, and been wanting to keep. But it was hers, and she was bound to go looking for it. At least now he would be able to look at her. Someone had made sure he couldn't get it to see her. At all. And Severus had a good idea who that someone was.

He wondered when she had gotten it. Was it a new thing? Or was it a secret that had been kept from him from all of those years. Nah, it was probably new, because it worked so well.

He kept to the walls, feeling like a snake slithering silently along or perhaps a spider stuck stickly to the walls with silk, and maneuvered to the Hospital Wing, taking short cuts and such to get to his goal, and to where his goal lay apparently still in a bad condition where Severus hadn't been able to come see her.

He kept out of the light. It was revealing, and even if he was invisible he felt exposed in its light. He'd been creeping in the dark for so long the light didn't feel at all natural.

He had timed all of this just right.

The full moon meant the werewolf was out in the Shrieking Shack. That meant that his friends would be out there howling at the moon with him. This meant that James Potter would not be near Lily Evans, making him able to see her without being murdered by the hotheaded Gryffindor.

He reached the door of the Hospital Wing, took a deep breathe, and opened the door, creeping into the Hospital Wing and straight to Lily Evans side.

She was beautiful. Enchanting. Incandescent.

Lily's hair was sprawled across her back (and lime green pajamas), shimmering in the moonlight and was in contrast with her beautiful pale face that had once been rounder and more girlish. Her freckles that had once been all over her face when they had been younger (and were still friends) were thinning to a few dots across her face, and more than anything he wished he could see her emerald sparkling eyes. The ones that pierced his soul with only an ephemeral glance.

He contented himself to watch her for a while, and gave a sigh.

He hated himself. He was awful. He really was.

He took off the invisibility cloak, and placed it under her pillow.

And under her hand he placed a single red rose, and she seemed to him to smile. Was that forgiveness? It felt like it. To be smiled at by someone like Lily Evans was like being blessed by an angel. His angel. His only hope for life…

Was he ever going to get that hope? He thought this to himself as he snuck away, now utterly visible and feeling more vulnerable than ever.

He turned to see her one last time.

And was gone.


	34. Deputy Headmistress' Magical Mistletoe

Lily was fully recovered and back on patrol duty forty eight hours later, much to her's, James', and all her friend's pleasure. The muggle blood had evened out in her, and everything would be ok, according to Madam Pomfrey. Madam Pomfrey admitted that it was one of the harder procedures, and that she had been a bit worried for a while- at which James gave her another shower of kisses and praise. She also said that the potion for her voice would be concocted soon. Whenever "soon" was.

A few weeks had passed since James had discovered the red rose in her hand and had been infuriated that someone had gotten past Madam Pomfrey while he'd been away with Remus (who no longer suffered from temporary amnesia) to visit him while he was sick in St. Mungo's.

Lily had shrugged and given him back his invisibility cloak.

He was happy to see that again, even if the red rose bugged him, and for his sake, she got rid of it, wondering who had given it to her, though she didn't really put much thought into it all.

Lily had in fact thought that James'd been the one to give it to her, so she'd treasured it until he'd gotten back. Maybe he'd gotten so mad because he was tired. Lily wondered why. Maybe she'd figure out sometime, but it didn't matter.

Now on patrol duty with James, they held hands with their wands lit.

James smiled and kissed her nose. He often gave her kisses like that now. He'd kiss her hand, her cheek, her forehead, her hair, and her nose just as often as he'd kiss her lips. It was like he was grateful that she was there by her side.

Her being sick hadn't really affected him that much, had it? And had she really been all that bad off?

"So Madam P. said that you were getting your voice back again, right?" said James with the same smile, interrupting her thoughts, but she was glad he did.

Blinking away sleep she nodded.

"Are you excited?"

She shrugged. Well, it would be nice to make some noise. It also would be nice to tell everyone what had been on her mind for a long time. But she'd adapted to never opening her mouth. Her friends could understand most of her moods by looking at her, and she was used to writing quickly and legibly to tell everyone why she was happy, sad, mad, etc. And James was with her always because he was her interpreter.

That was her biggest fear. That if James heard her talk he wouldn't be around her anymore. That she might say something that she didn't mean like she used to. That she would push him away. That he wouldn't feel the need to be around her anymore because she could talk for herself.

Because even if she could talk, James had become an inseparable part of her life. If he didn't hang out with her anymore, it would be like holding her breathe for too long.

But if she was too clingy? What if he dumped her? What would she do? She'd never been able to think of someone else to be with… what did that mean? But she felt it. She felt that she knew that she'd never be in love with anyone else… but if he dumped her, what was she going to do? Be an old maid? Or stalk him? (if he really did dump her she would probably do the latter). But… oh, this was so complicated!

"What?" he said surprised, "You're not excited?"

She shrugged again as the same thoughts whirled through her head.

She never thought that she could be with anyone else.

Could she? No, she couldn't. James was too perfect. But if she got her voice back would she be less than perfect for him? TOO COMPLEX!

"Well, I'm excited," he said with a smile as they stopped by a window. The light from the moon was bright, even if it was only a half moon. It pooled out and made James' eyes sparkle. Suddenly, he looked intent, and nervous. "And I can make you excited to get your voice back, I hope, because I won't take a written or a gesture answer for it."

Lily cocked her head at him, curious. What was he talking about?

He pushed back his hair, and exhaled loudly.

What was it? And why was he so nervous?

He didn't meet her eyes as he said, "I know it's a little sudden, but in all honesty… I don't ever think anyone else could take your place, and I hope you feel the same way about me too," he said quickly. "Really, really hope," he mumbled. He looked like he was going to play in the World Cup times ten.

Wait, what was going on?

"Lily Evans?" he said quietly, now peering intently in her eyes. She stared straight back, happy to be lost in their hazel depths.

He opened his mouth-

"Potter, Evans! I'm so glad I found you," McGonagall's voice came up to them.

They jumped ten feet, and swirled around to meet her.

Lily's heart sank, and she panted like she'd been holding her breathe. There was a knot in the pit of her stomach. How odd! What was she? Lovesick? …Did she have to answer?

"The Christmas decorations, could you help? We've been decorating all evening, but it doesn't seem as though we'll be finished in time," McGonagall didn't see the unhappy look on James' face, but Lily did. She rubbed the back of his hand to comfort him a bit, and she saw him make a grim smile in her direction.

Lily nodded cheerily.

"What do you need us to do, Professor?" he said stoutly.

"I figured since I know on good authority that you know every inch of this school building and the grounds beyond and that you and the rest of the Marauders do enjoy this sort of pranking, Potter that you and Evans could hang up the mistletoe." She gave them a half sarcastic look, half a strange mysterious look that partially worried Lily. Professor McGonagall wasn't supposed to be mischievous. That was completely unlike her, and most definitely frightened Lily. What about the rigid Professor that they all knew and loved?

"What did you do to the mistletoe, Professor?" asked James, who must have also sensed the air around their teacher, seeing as he must have felt it all the time. But he didn't seem worried. Lily saw that prankster face of his light up. Oh Merlin.

"Well, it would be the Headmaster's idea. Personally, for us, this is a test trial to see if this will work, but when the Headmaster and I were in school the mistletoe was this way. If you step under the mistletoe, you will be frozen until someone kisses you."

Lily stared in surprise. Maybe that wasn't so bad.

"Foolish, most definitely, but I find that it would be rather entertaining, as long as everyone makes it to class on time. We'll see how it works out. The mistletoe is downstairs in the Great Hall. Ask Hagrid if you need some help," McGonagall said, smiling.


	35. RockPaperScissors

(A/N: Thank you all for the reviews. This is just a cutesy chapter, and I want everyone to know I'm going for 400 reviews so… REVIEW please! And to everyone who reads, thanks a lot for taking the time to read my gibberish!)

"You would think," said James, hanging what seemed to be the thousandth bit of magical mistletoe, "that they could do it themselves."

Lily only smiled at him, nodding. Oh for all good, why couldn't she keep her eyes open? The mistletoe she was levitating into the air drooped, and fell. She groaned inaudibly. She was such a spaz. She had already tripped over her own feet twice (at least she hoped it was only twice).

James smiled, "Lily dearest, I'm taking you to the Tower."

She shook her head fiercely, her red hair dancing. _No way_.

"Troll bullocks, you are going to bed even if I have to carry you there," he said, sticking his mistletoe to the ceiling with a spell before he came over to her, looking very tall and very capable of doing such a thing. But Lily stood her ground, very capable herself, but not exactly feeling it. "We're almost done."

She gave him a sarcastic look. _As if_.

"Well, only two more hours- at most. McGonagall gave us permission to cut all tomorrow- which I honestly must say is a relief, because that means only two more days left of school- so-."

She nodded curtly, _So I'm staying_.

"Not a chance," he grinned.

She held out a fist expectantly.

"We're not rock-paper-scissoring this one," he said exasperatedly.

_Alright then_, she turned her back to him, and began to magically lift the mistletoe in the air. She heard his grumpy sigh, and began to smile. She must be a good persuader as a mute 'cause it certainly hadn't worked while she talked.

"Fine."

She grinned and spun back around with a fist at the ready. He grinned, and counted for them, "One, two, _three_!"

She held out a paper, and he a rock, which he quickly changed to scissors. She shook her head, and grinned_. _

_I win!_

"Best two out of three," he pleaded.

She shook her head, still beaming, and turned away from him. But suddenly his arms looped around her waste. Tensing she was ready to be hoisted into the air, but he stayed put. She looked up at him. He looked down at her. She couldn't help but smile softly and blush.

"Please?" he said softly.

This was _insane_! She was ready to faint! It was like he had set some kind of spell over her or something. She was ready to say yes- what was she saying yes to again?- and then she got really dizzy, and she felt him take on more of her weight.

He kissed her forehead, and smiled. "Lily, you can't even stand up straight," he said, raising his eyebrows. She frowned stubbornly, and stood straighter. He laughed. "You're more obstinate than you should be allowed to be." She grinned broadly at that.

Smiling still she broke free of his grasp, and hung her mistletoe.

"Too obstinate," he gave her a look.

She shrugged, levitating the box of mistletoe. She pointed whether they should go up or down. He rolled his eyes. "Up."


	36. Sleepy Head Girl

That girl just fell asleep!

James rolled his eyes with a smile. But at least they had finished. She had stuck to the very last bit of mistletoe before crashing. And who could blame her? James was tired too. He'd stayed up later, obviously with Remus and the lot, but this was… well, not exactly as exhilarating as running with a werewolf at the dead of night.

He pocketed his wand with a flourish, and stood in front of her. She was leaning against the wall, with her head- cushioned by her arm- lay on the rim of the now empty mistletoe box.

He shook his head, still smiling, fingering the box in his pocket.

He'd almost done it. And yet he couldn't catch a break. That was his second attempt at it. The first had been disastrous with Sirius nearby. He couldn't exactly remember what had hit him in the head. Had it been a snowball? Or had it been a book?

He stopped smiling as one thought ran through his head.

What if she said no?

His whole gut wrenched at the thought. He was so in love with her. It was like they had always been together. If she said no, that would be… unbearable. He wouldn't be able to get on normally.

What if she said no?

She had every right to. She might not even love him, even if she seemed to. Not to mention they were too young, they had only been together for a few months, they didn't have an income, a house, anything. (Well, they had his father's old family fortune… which could keep them living for the rest of their lives comfortably and probably their kids' and their kids' lives, but…)

What if she said no!?

He shook his head, shrugging that idea off, and yet it lurked in the back of his mind, so he thought of other, less terrifying things.

Well, he should at least get her to bed.

Bed! Ah, that sounded like heaven just then.

He pulled her into his arms, gently moving her head so it rested on his chest, made sure her arms didn't dangle, and carried her to the Tower. It wasn't very far, just down a few steps, and a few corridors. He was talking to the Fat Lady within minutes.

"What did you do to the poor dear? It's four thirty in the morning!" the Fat Lady was saying- or more like scolding.

"McGonagall's orders," he shrugged, and for a moment almost lost hold of Lily. The Fat Lady clucked at him, and then coughed.

"Alright then, password?" she said now half asleep.

"Horse radish," he said, and the Fat Lady let them in.

He then realized there was a problem. He couldn't exactly just carry her up the stairs to the Girl's Dormitory. He must have been tired, because he didn't exactly remember what he had done with her, that is, until he woke up on the floor that morning to everyone's howls.

Someone threw a pillow at his head.

Honestly, if it was one of Peter's nightmares, there would be murder in Hogwarts.

He jolted up with a groan, pulling the pillow over his head while his glasses falling to the floor. He peeked out from under it in a gouchy state, but to his surprise he saw the light from the windows and not candles. How odd. It certainly didn't feel like morning!

"Prongs, mate, what were you doing last night?" Sirius said, thumping him on the back. James sat up, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand.

Still, too dazed, James' face made a "Huh?" expression.

"James, please say you didn't," Remus said in hushed tones.

"Do what?"

Sirius handed him his glasses as James stood. Merlin, he was still exhausted from last night's mistletoe hanging. "You know," Sirius said, motioning to James' bed.

Lily lay dead asleep, sprawled on her back with her forearm under her pillow.

"Oh," James moaned, "I forgot… the mistletoe."

"What mistletoe?" Sirius said suggestively, "Eh, eh?" he winked. James didn't get it. It was too early in the morning. Sirius was being too cryptic, and honestly, James didn't care yet. He closed his eyes longingly, and ran a hand through his hair.

"The stuff McGonagall made us hang and we got really tired- and then she fell asleep," James yawned, "And so I figured she could sleep up here. Can I go back to bed now?"

"Bad luck, mate, we've got school," Sirius said, going to the mirror. He was already dressed and had now moved to the "fixing the hair" process. "So," he continued as Peter went down the stairs and Frank moved into the bathroom. "What did she say?"

"Say to wha-?" James asked, laying on his make-shift pile of blankets (he really didn't like to get cold) and pulling two over him.

"What did Lily say? You know, say?" he could tell James wasn't getting it. Sirius rolled his eyes. James must've not slept at all last night. "Say to the question," Sirius said, "Because if she did, I call being godfather!"

"Oh," James said, propping himself up by the elbows again. "I didn't ask it yet."

"But you said you were going to," Remus pointed out, sounding a bit disappointed in him.

"Got cold feet?" Sirius asked, half teasing, half scathing.

"No," James said a bit touchily, taking off his glasses, and setting them aside, "McGonagall got in the way."

"Uh huh," Sirius mumbled.

A pillow hit him in the face.

"Who's shoes are these?" Frank asked from the doorway to the bathroom, a towel on, and his hair dripping.

"Oh, Lily's," James said before collapsing on the pillow with another yawn. "And McGonagall said Lily and me can cut school today so- 'night."

He reveled in his friend's faces for a few more moments with a half smirk before falling back into an easy sleep. His friends were ridiculous.

"What?" Remus said, surprised.

"That's not fair!" Sirius exclaimed.

"McGonagall's orders. Have fun at school today," he said, his head now buried in the pillow to block out the light as Sirius continued to grumble loudly, and just to be and antagonist, he waved them away and said, "Close the curtains please."

James chuckled when he heard something like, "Bloody McGonagall- Big Head Boy's more like it."

"By the way," he said before he went back to sleep. "Watch out for the mistletoe."


	37. Malevolent or Benevolent? Mistletoe

(A/N: I put this in to "slow things down". And I know everything's quick, but so was James' and Lily's engagement. Everyone was marrying everyone in, how does J. K. put it?- dark times… was there a better phrase for that?

But anyways… 412!! I love you guys! You're amazing! Thanks for reading! So to all you R/T fans out there, here's something cute!)

Bloody Bogarts, she was late.

Her morning had been stressful. First her hair didn't turn the exact shade of pink that she wanted, so she went with purple curls instead. Then her friend Kingsley had to save her from the mistletoe.

The mistletoe.

Oh whoever invented it was getting a serious howler from her. And maybe the curse of the Boogies (that was, when she learned it.)

Was it four or five times that she'd been caught under it? She couldn't- or honestly didn't want to remember. Poor Kingsley (a third year best friend) had to kiss her once, and then he was done.

He made jokes about needing to brush his teeth ever since.

That was only yesterday, and he'd saved her (by pulling her out from under it before the spell caught her- no more kissing involved- thankfully, because it was like kissing a brother) from the stuff multiple times now.

And then some strangers had kissed her and run off so she could make it to class. If that wasn't awkward she didn't know what was.

And she'd just barely avoided a bunch now.

Because she was looking so much at the ceiling she didn't know where her feet were going and had tripped over several things already and made more of a scene than any other five people could do in their whole life times.

If she didn't make it to Potions she would blame the Merlin thrice accursed stuff.

She took the left side down to the dungeons at a sprint to make it on time, managed to trip over her own feet, fell down a fourth of the stairs and landed sprawled under a bunch of mistletoe, watching her bag split open and ink smash everywhere, including her brand new socks that her mum had bought her, not including her bag, her books and her parchment. And then she was stuck there, looking at the empty corridor.

If she had been able to talk right then she would have used a few choice swear words and then would have torn the stuff into ribbons, burned it, and flushed the whole lot down the loo.

Dratted dumb dragon dung mistletoe!

To think that some girls got caught under this stuff on purpose made her want to gag. And it happened to. Some girls like that Mary girl in seventh year in Gryffindor did it, and got a brand new boyfriend. She hadn't done it since.

And there was a difference between a first and seventh year.

Tonks tried to move. With all her might. Of course it didn't work. Who had ever created this stuff was a better jinxer than she was, that was for sure. Which wasn't saying much because she was a first year.

The warning bell rang.

Buggering blockheaded person who created this crap. After this she was going up to the Headmaster and demanding the stuff be taken down if not for her own safety than for the sake of her sanity.

"Look, an ickle Gryffindor first year!" jeered somebody. He had an ugly face, standing by that one Slytherin Sirius and James and Remus didn't like at all- the one with the hooked nose and greasy black hair.

Great.

Too bad she could move her eyes, or else she wouldn't have been able to see them. But in a gesture she rolled her eyes at them.

"Oh, she doesn't look very happy, does she?"

No dip, dung head.

"Is that the girl that was with Lupin and Black that night?" said a third voice.

Immediately she felt that grease head's black eyes zoom in on her.

"Yeah, that metamorphing girl. The Gryffindor one that gave me the black eye with a spell," said the one that had called her ickle.

"And now she's stuck under the mistletoe."

"You know what the price is for fighting a Death Eater?" said the second one who had said he'd gotten a black eye. He squatted in front of her, looking at her in anger. When the blank look was in her eyes he let the word slip out sadistically. "Death."

"Hey, you three, get to class!"

All of them spun 'round and someone came stalking up the hall.

"See you later," said the boy who she'd apparently given the black eye to, twisting a purple curl in between his fingers with a grin that would have made her shiver if she could move, and left with the others at a sprint to catch up.

He came running up to her with his wand drawn, but thankfully he hadn't had to use it, so he pocketed it, and blew his awry sandy hair out of his face.

"Nymphadora," he grinned, "look at the mess you've gotten yourself into this time. What'd you do? Upset them and they pushed you down the stairs?"

She looked up at him as he sat down next to her.

"Sorry," he said, his grin fading, "I didn't mean to make you angry, here, let me help you up," he said, taking a hold of one of her arms. Of course she didn't budge.

Finally he put two and two together when he looked up at the ceiling.

"Ah," he said with a smile, "So that's why you didn't fight back. For a moment there I thought they had jinxed your voice away like Lily."

He gave her a swift kiss on the lips.

She felt her face melt, and then her body, but she hadn't expected her heart to melt too. To her embarrassment she felt the prickling sensation of a blush creeping up her cheeks.

She moved quickly away from the stuff, and Remus gave her a hand up.

"Thanks a million, Remus, I thought I was going to-,"

The bell rang over head.

"Miss class?" he finished for her, another wolfish grin spreading across his face. "I'll help you get there. They can't take points away if you were late because you got stuck under the mistletoe."

"Unless you're Professor Binns you can't. He took away ten points because I was late," Tonks complained as they picked up her books. Remus jinxed them clean of ink stain for her.

"Ah, Binns is an old bat. You'll get used to him," Remus said, mending her bag for her as well, and stuffing the books back inside, and took a bottle his ink out of his bag, and put it in her bag to replace her smashed ones.

"Remus you really don't-."

"Ah, but I do," he said with a grin. "It's Christmas, remember?"

"Not yet it's not," she pointed out.

He merely shrugged, still smiling.

They walked down the hallway to her class briskly.

"Well, then, Happy early Christmas, Nymphadora," he said, opening the door for her, and telling Slughorn, "Professor, she got stuck under the mistletoe," interrupting the lesson.

Tonks felt every eye turn towards them.

"Oh poor girl," said Slughorn from the front of the room, "Send her in, Lupin, send her in. Five points to Gryffindor for your chivalry," he said with a wink at Remus. Tonks felt herself blush.

Remus rolled his eyes at Tonks, and then headed off, saying, "Be seeing you!" in a low voice.

She watched his retreating back until the door closed.

"Miss Tonks, if you would be seated. Even if it's the Holidays we still have to keep a bit of our heads 'til the end of term, and then you can loose it over boys."

The class giggled as Tonks sat down in the back, blushing hard.

But, however, maybe the mistletoe wasn't so bad after all.


	38. Past Sadness, New Joy

(A/N: This one is a little free spirited. I didn't know all of what happened to Lily's parents, or what happened to her when she found out, so I made stuff up.)

Lily woke slowly.

She stretched, and yawned, and wondered why by Godric her sheets smelled so funny. She had a headache like she's had a troll bash her skull and now she was being healed. Maybe she was in the Hospital Wing?

So finally she opened her eyes. When the light poured in like it did in her dormitory it took a mere second for her to realize she was late.

She jumped out of bed, running to her closet. Except her closet had moved. And that didn't look like her closet. Maybe Mary had done some spell last night and Alice hadn't fixed it.

But when she opened her closet for clothes, all she found was a mess. A horrible tangle of clothes met her eyes, and they weren't girl's clothes either. What had Mary done now?

She looked around, hoping to find an answer.

And there it was, walking through the door from the bathroom, draping a shirt over himself. His hair was wet and ruffled, and he grinned at the sight of her.

"Finally you're up, Sleeping Beauty," he said, wrapping her in a hug.

She blinked, surprised. Was it a weekend?

"It's eleven," he continued, pulling her away as a few droplets fell off his hair. "And you slept so soundly I was going to have to kiss you awake."

Wait… what? Why was James in the girl's dorm? Or why was Lily in the boy's dorm?! What had happened last night?

The mistletoe. She remembered that. And that she'd stayed up so late that even the wooden box had felt comfortable. She must have fallen asleep. So why wasn't she in her dorm? Or if she was, why was James here? No, this had to be the boy's dorm.

"You fell asleep," James explained, "and I didn't know what to do with you, so, you know, I took you upstairs. Don't worry, you're fine. I promise. And if you remember, we don't have to go to classes today. We're skipping on the Professor's orders. Isn't it excellent?"

Skipping? Oh yeah… Everything was ok. She sighed, and smiled at him and gave him a kiss on the cheek good morning, before walking back to his bed and sitting on it.

"So what'd you want to do today?"

She shrugged, observing the room. It was messy, except for one sector, which she guessed was Remus' part of the room. It reeked both visually and smell wise, of boy-dom. Unmade beds, clothes on the floor, and what she supposed were pranks scattered about. It wasn't awful, at least, though it wasn't exactly wonderful either.

She gave him a sarcastic look.

"I'm a guy, what did you expect?" he grinned, sitting beside her. "We clean once a week."

_Uh huh,_ said her facial expression.

"Alright, once a month," he corrected, "And you're seeing it at it's worst."

She shook her head, smiling. Messiness didn't bother her a twit.

"So, what do you want to do?"

She poked him in the chest, _What do you want to do?_

"Hmm, we could sneak down to the kitchens and have a bite to eat?" he said hopefully, his eyebrows raised, taking her hands in his.

She laughed noiselessly, wrinkling her nose.

"Again, guy," he motioned to himself, standing, and taking her with him. "C'mon, let's go."

She frowned for a moment, and scratched her head. When she realized her hair must have been at that moment in front of James Potter a complete and absolute catastrophe.

James looked concerned at her facial expression. "What is it?"

She was pressing her hands over her head as though that would help.

"What?" he said, annoyed that he couldn't understand what she was worried about. But he understood when she bit her lip and combed her hair with her fingers. He rolled his eyes, "Lily, you look fine."

How did he always know what the problem was?

"Honestly, you do," he said, taking her hands away from her hair. "And if you didn't I still wouldn't care. You're always beautiful," he continued, kissing her nose. "Plus I'm hungry."

What has that got to do with anything?

"Everything," he said, looking back at her.

How did he do that?

"If you really feel so self conscious about it, then we'll stop by your room for a moment, deal?"

She nodded.

Twenty minutes later Lily met a very hungry James. She felt so much better that she had had the shower, however, even if James was ravenous.

The halls were unusually quiet during their walk from the Tower to the Kitchens. It wasn't the same sleepy quiet of the night hours. It was more of a tension that was in the air, like everyone was positively screaming that they wanted to get out and go home for vacation.

Oh yeah… going home for vacation.

Lily wasn't going home. Not that she had a home to go to anymore. Not since the car accident.

"What's up now? You gorgeous!" James whispered, looping her arm through his.

She smiled a bit at that, and shrugged.

"Christmas is almost here. No school. Presents. Going home for the Holidays. Speaking of which, do you mind visiting my place for Christmas dinner? I want my parents to meet you. I hope your mum and dad don't mind too much. They have your other sister, right? And isn't she getting married soon or what not?"

Lily nodded.

Mum and Dad.

Nobody knew they'd died last spring- at least in the Wizarding world. Lily hadn't even heard about it until she'd come home that summer and her parent's house had been sold. Apparently Petunia hadn't bothered to invite her to their funeral. Or mention the fact that she was going to marry someone- was it Vermont? Varnon? Something like that.

She had stayed at her aunt's house this summer, with seven raging kids, and a husband that got paid too much. Her aunt hadn't minded. But her uncle… well, the whole "witch" thing had freaked him out. She wouldn't be staying with them again.

She'd gotten over most of it. Her parents still loved her, wherever they were, and they cared about her and Petunia. She would see them again in the afterlife, whatever that was. It was just… hard. Not having them here and now for Christmas and everything.

"What is it?" James said, interrupting her thoughts.

She blinked at him. _What do you mean_?

"Don't you give me that. What's wrong?"

_Nothing. _

"Sure it's not. Your parents won't mind me will they?" he grinned.

She smiled and shook her head.

"What? Your sister then?"

She shook her head again.

"Lil-ee!" he said, exasperated.

So she played charades with him since she didn't have parchment.

"Eye," he said, "No Go Home for mistletoe," he said after two minutes of stringing each word together

She rolled her eyes. _Not mistletoe_, she thought, still pointing at a garland of mistletoe that had been hung the night before by the couple, _Christmas! Christmas_!

"Christmas?"

She nodded. He was so good at this game.

He pondered for a moment before saying the sentence out loud, "Eye No Go Home for Christmas- wait- you're not going home for Christmas? Why not?" James said, stopping, and drawing her toward a window. The snow and the gray sky poured in a weird mixture of light, and it oddly silhouetted the two figures, making them look almost angelic.

She shrugged.

"Is that what happened this summer?" James asked.

How did he know everything?

"Did something happen in your house? Is it because you're a witch?" he persisted. A sudden flash of anger surprised Lily.

Lily shook her head.

"What then? Did something happen to your house?" he said, the anger ebbing away to concern.

She shook her head again.

"Your parents." It wasn't a question.

She nodded slowly.

"Did they-?"

She smiled slightly at him, and nodded.

He kissed her forehead, and drew her close.

"How come you didn't tell anyone?"

She shrugged. She was good at that.

"You should have told me."

Lily just stood there. It hadn't seemed important at the time. It was just a fact. She missed them, and they missed her. It was kind of like a long term boarding school where she couldn't go home until she died. But at least someday she would go home, and they would be there to greet her with open arms.

"And you've accepted it," James said, pulling her back to look at her face.

She nodded.

"You're so brave, Lily Evans. That's one of the reasons I love you."

Her heart swelled at the thought. Only James Potter could take a moment of misery to a moment of joy within a sentence.

She smiled, and closed her eyes as she hugged him.

"There are so many reasons why I love you Lily. So many. You're caring, and smart, and understanding, and funny, and serious, and brave, and loyal."

_You too_, was all she was thinking. _You're all that and more, James_.

"That's why, Lily," he said, pulling away from her again so that she could look him in the eyes, "That even though this is such short notice, that I don't think I could ever be with anyone else."

Her heart stopped when he got down on one knee.

"Lily Evans, would you," he said, smoothly pulling a box out of his pocket, "marry me?"

They got to the Kitchens in such moods not even Hogwarts- or the world- could contain them. It took Lily everything she had to not burst at the seems.

The house elves lined in rows to meet them.

"Hello, Mr. Potter, Miss," they said in unison, bowing to them.

Lily blinked in surprise. How often did James sneak down to the kitchens?

"Hello, everyone," James said, "I was wondering if you lot would have a bit of breakfast left over?" When he got a look from Lily he added, "Please?"


	39. Her Left Hand

(A/N: OMGosh, we can go for five hundred

(A/N: OMGosh, we can go for five hundred! I wasn't going to say anything, but now it's seriously possible! Thank you all so much for reviewing! I couldn't have made it anywhere without you all!)

Lily smiled mischievously. She was winning.

School had ended. Break had come. And everyone had stayed. The plan was that they would split up tomorrow to go home for Christmas dinner, and Christmas, then come back before New Year and get together.

She knew it was something to do with James and she was thankful for him.

However, now was a full fledged snow ball fight with no teams, and she was winning. Remus was going to be the end of her reign, though, if he kept hitting Peter. And James was hunting her down, trying to get Sirius off his trail, and giving poor little Alice a white wash. Mary was just getting hit all the time by Sirius, though she managed a few herself. Frank, on the other hand, was scary. No one could find out where he was, but when he struck, you could tell it was him.

Lily mashed a snow ball in her mitts while hiding behind the beech tree that was so wonderful during the early summers and spring. That's when she chucked her snowball at Sirius, who was the closest to her hide out.

But she was hit in the back.

By who?

She whirled, totally expecting it to be James because she'd lost track of him.

Severus Snape stood in front of her, hands in his robes.

Black met green.

Lily backed into the tree, opening her mouth to call for James, but no sound came, obviously. She didn't like Sev's look.

Snape reached out, and gripped her left wrist. She tried to tug away as he pulled off her mitt. Her hand was numb from the snow.

But that's not what Sev was looking for.

He stared at her occupied fourth finger, dropping her mitt. They both stared at it. He seemed to gap at the ring on her finger, as though it were the end of the world.

"I can't believe it," he said, his voice quivering with several emotions- she couldn't read them all. Anger, hatred, misery... "Him, Lily? The arrogant toe rag?"

She frowned, and tried to pull her hand away angrily.

Suddenly his dark eyes met hers. Lily didn't know what to be. Angry or pitying. His eyes were full of tears, as well as a madness. But if he thought that he could change how she felt about James he was wasting his time.

"Lily… you can't- you won't- he doesn't- I- love you… Lily, you just-," he was stumbling over his words. She looked away. She was remembering all of those times they'd spent together as children. He was the first one to tell her that she was a witch, after all.

"Lily?" a different voice called in concern. James. She made to turn around to find him, but Sev shoved her against the tree. And then Sev's face was too close to hers.

Wide eyed doe didn't fully cover her expression.

But when he kissed her, she pitched a fit. She twisted, trying to break free from him, but it wasn't working. Since when was Sev so strong?

"Hey!" James' voice barked.

"What the ruddy-!"

Snape broke off the kiss, and looked at James with such a hatred Lily couldn't even begin to comprehend for anybody. He looked back at Lily, and whispered to her, "Don't marry him, Lily, please," before running.

James stopped at Lily, who was completely stunned, and wiping her mouth off, while Sirius ran by, going after Snape.

Lily thought she heard Sirius roaring, "Oh no you don't! I'm going to be the best man, you buggering-!"

James was surveying Lily up and down.

"Are you alright?" he asked fervently, grasping her shoulders.

She nodded, still completely doe eyed.

"He's still dead."

She was doe eyed again.

James grinned, shaking her shoulders and brushing off some of the snow from the top of her head. "Don't worry."

"Yeah," said Sirius, "The Potters won't kill you or anything."

Lily was still nervous. She was meeting her future in-laws in the next two minutes. The house was enormous, she should have worn something more formal, and her gloves had holes in the fingers.

"You're being silly, Lily me-love," James said, wrapping her arm in his. "They'll approve of you one hundred percent. I've told them so much about you they'll be glad to finally meet you."

"They had asked that you be kidnapped and taken hostage so that they could at least talk to you," Sirius said, offhandedly. James rolled his eyes.

"You're not helping."

"When have I ever helped?"

The house was large. And the indoor furnishings could have made the house look like a museum, if it hadn't looked so lived in. And it did. Old parchment in different stacks, books scattered over the floor, and potion ingredients surrounding the kitchen sink pell mell made it so- alive.

"James!" said a woman, short with light brown hair and a smile to brighten the darkest room, hugging him tightly. James hugged back.

"Mum!" James said in return, and kissed her cheek.

"And Sirius, dear," she said, moving from James to Sirius, as though they were both sons, and related to her.

"Mum Potter," Sirius grinned, and kissed her cheek too.

"I swear you both were never so tall," she said, standing back to get a good look at them, "Nor so grown up. Dear!" she called to the back, "Where did you put that ageing potion? I need to reverse it quick, or they'll be too big to stay here!"

Sirius and James laughed.

"And, Mum," James said, now taking Lily out from where she had hidden behind them, "I want you to meet someone."

The moment Mrs. Potter saw her she smiled knowingly.

Lily, bashful, looked down, blushing.

"This, Mother, is Lily soon-to-be Potter," James announced, wrapping an arm around her. Lily blushed even more.

"And guess whose best man?" Sirius said happily.

"Lily, dear," smiled Mrs. Potter, and took Lily's hands in her own. "I know so much about you I would consider us friends. But look at you!"

Oh no. She knew she should have dressed better.

"You're cold as ice. Come to the fireplace. What did they do to you, drop you in a snow bank?" she smiled, placing her arm around Lily's shoulders to help her follow. She was so graceful. Lily smiled back at James' abused look.

"Mum!"

"We haven't done anything of the sort- yet," Sirius grinned mischievously.

"Mr. Potter," said Mrs. Potter, "We have guests!"

Mr. Potter sat bolt upright in his chair, swinging his feet onto the floor, and folding up his newspaper. "Sorry, I was- oh, this must be Lily Evans," he said with a grin. Oh Merlin, she now knew what James was going to look like when he was older. They were almost identical, except James was taller, and Mr. Potter had smile lines on his face and flecks of gray in his hair.

Mr. Potter offered her a hand.

"Hello, Lily, I'm apparently your future in-law," he grinned. It was so strange!

She nodded, smiling happily, taking in the Christmas decorations and the large and beautiful tree in the corner.

"She says Hello back," James said, taking Lily under his wing, "I think I told you both about the potion's accident?"

"Yes," said Mr. Potter with a grim expression, "And it's too bad. We'll have to hear you speak another time. James has said, wasn't it first year?- like it was 'the sound of an angel?'"

Lily blushed.

"It's true," James said. "I can't wait to hear it."

"I would like to hear as well. James, you should come around for Easter vacation. Then we can really get to know her, and we can make wedding plans," Mrs. Potter said, and added, to Sirius' delight, "Who's hungry?"


	40. The End or the Beginning?

A/N: Dear reviewers, I am sorry to say that all stories must come to an end, even if they are as wonderful as you exaggerate

(A/N: PAST 500! YES!)

Lily sat in Ancient Runes. Only thirty more minutes till lunch.

Not that the class was boring. Not that the teacher wasn't good. Not that her classmates were dull. No, it was that James wasn't here. Sighing, she looked at the watch on her wrist. Nope, still twenty eight minutes left.

Christmas was long gone. The Potters now wrote Lily and James about wedding plans. Remus was second best man. Peter had drifted off from the group. He was hiding something, or so Remus would say conspiratorially, but honestly, Remus was extraordinarily happy because of James' and Sirius' Christmas gift, a small mirror with a handle, and another gift, something to do with Tonks, that she hadn't heard more than jeering from Sirius.

Frank Longbottom had proposed to Alice, and had asked Lily to be the maid of honor along with Mary. Mary was dating somebody. All was right with the world.

And February 14 had arrived.

James had been really cute this morning. He'd woken her up at six in the morning throwing pebbles on her window.

_She threw him an impossible look, as though to say _James Potter, what by Merlin are you doing?

_James was sitting on his broom, looking totally at easy. "Morning, Lily," he grinned, handing her roses. She put them on her bed. _

_She was gapping at him, no understanding in her mind. He was half a thousand feet in the air, and was reaching toward her, standing up on his broom handle, to reach her onto the broom._

_She shook her head violently, but wasn't quick enough to get away. He seated her gently behind him, and swirled around to sit. "Hang on tight, Lily." _

_And she did, with her eyes shut. The wind was whooshing through the air, and the cold air stung her face, and she had a feeling they were going upward… she thought. _

_But they stopped. _

_"It's ok, Lily, I'm not going to let you fall. Look," James said, throwing his legs around so he was sitting side saddle. Lily opened her eyes bit by bit. _

_The gray sky was turning to a delicate shade of pink. The world was white, with hints of green amid the Forbidden Forest. The castle was picturesque. Any person would have said so, even if they were the grouchiest person in the world. She could see the entire world it seemed, from the mountain range to mountain range, and it was breathe-taking. _

_"I love coming up here in the morning," James said, keeping her close to him. "Even if it is cold," he said as the air formed a puff around his mouth as he spoke. She smiled, hugging closer to him while her toes grew cold. _

_"And I wanted to share it with you. I wanted to give you the world today, so here it is, as far as the eye can see," he whispered for her, and kissed her forehead. _

"Lily Evans?" said a voice, "Madam Pomfrey wants Lily Evans in her office right away," said a small voice. A boy with red hair stood at the door. He was that first year Gryffindor, Charles Weasley.

"Alright, go ahead, Miss Evans," said her teacher.

What? More testing? Madam Pomfrey's check ups hadn't been in a while. Maybe she needed to make sure a fungus wasn't growing up her throat or something.

She packed her things, and walked to the Hospital Wing, looking at her watch. It was twenty minutes until lunch. Twenty minutes until James. She smiled. She was marrying someone she had detested all her life, until this year. And it was ironic, she knew. Maybe she had thought the love was hate. Who knew what she'd thought? She loved James. She was so glad they were getting married. She couldn't wait.

She yawned as she headed into the nurse's wing, and sat on a bed.

Two boys from her potions class walked out of the nurse's office, talking excitedly.

The bell rang. Great, now James would be waiting for her at lunch in the Great Hall. Hopefully Madam Pomfrey would hurry up.

"Oh Helga, this is great!" one said.

"Yeah, I wanna scream or something," said the other.

They were both Hufflepuffs… and weren't they the ones that had-

"Lily, my dear," said Madam Pomfrey, walking out of her office with a vile. "I know you've been waiting for this for a while. Hurry, drink up, or it might get contaminated," said Madam Pomfrey, holding out the vile and uncorking it.

Lily took it immediately. She swallowed, feeling a honey-ish liquid seep down her neck, and it was cool and refreshing, like she'd had a sore throat for a really long time or had had muggle strep. She sighed.

She grinned happily, running from the room.

"Wait, we- oh, well, young hearts beat too fast I suppose," Madam Pomfrey chuckled, walking back into her office.

Lily ran until she caught up with the crowd hastening toward the Great Hall. She wove her way through the crowd. Running, and spotted James at the table, looking around, nervously.

He didn't see her until the last minute when she sprinted into his arms.

"Lily, what's-."

"I love you!" she shouted at him. "I love you so much!"

James pulled away from her, his face surprised.

"I do!"

James laughed, "You got your voice back!"

He swung her around.

She smiled, and laughed with him.

"I wanted to tell you before anything else," she said to him.

"I love you, Lily," he whispered, and kissed her.

"Isn't that sweet?" Tonks smiled, sighing beside Remus and Sirius as they watched the scene before them.

"Please," Sirius said sarcastically as though it grossed him out like it would a normal brother, "You're such a girl."

"And you're such a guy," she said, jabbing him unhappily with her fork, "Isn't it cute, Remus? I want someone to do that to me!"

Remus shook his head, but smiled.

A/N: Dear reviewers, I am sorry to say that all stories must come to an end, even if they are as wonderful as you exaggerate. However, I will be writing other stories, and you can catch up on them. And I seriously want to thank you guys for all of this. I really really appreciate all that you do. Thank you for everything.

-Teddy's Twin

Here are the two new story summaries.

Hogwarts Without Harry Potter

-Ginny Weasley is back at Hogwarts for her sixth year. She isn't exactly happy. Harry, Ron and Hermione are gone. She has barely any company, except Luna and Neville. Plus the fact that Death Eaters are controlling her school makes the experience less than wonderful on the whole. She needs to do something to help the school.

So the P.A. is born. Potter's Army is the beginning. With Peeves, teachers and classmates helping, how does Ginny handle it all without Harry's help?

(In this I go off the course of the seventh book because I don't like it all of it.)

Harry/Ginny, McGonagall/Dumbledore, Neville/Luna

Untitled For Now

-Remus, Sirius, and Tonks are great friends through the Order. Tonks is a double agent, working for the Order as well as the Ministry, which is risky all in itself. However, apparently, someone is on her tail, and Remus has an idea of who it is. That's when Snape, Moody, Remus and Tonks get assigned a mission- Fenrir Greyback. He's up to something horrible, and they have to figure out what before it's too late.

Remus/Tonks, and I don't know what else yet.


End file.
